I think that female friendships are probably the best thing in the whole world, and I’m really fortunate to have my ladies by my side. However, not everyone is lucky enough, as some just get stuck with the most toxic friends possible.
Just look at this teen who had to endure everything her bestie demanded after she was disabled in an accident. One day, she even accused her of thievery when she was the one who had done it, and things quickly fell apart. Read on to find out how it sparked more drama!
More info: Reddit
Sometimes, people get stuck in the most toxic friendships ever and don't even realize it
Image credits: EyeEm / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The poster has been friends with "A" for over 11 years, and was also there for her when she became disabled due to an accident
Image credits: Throwawayonionrings2
Image credits: EyeEm / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Even when the poster's dog passed away at the same time, she had to suppress that and would always listen to A's demands, which sparked resentment within her
Image credits: Throwawayonionrings2
Image credits: pressfoto / Freepik (not the actual photo)
One day, however, A stole some clothes at the mall and tried to pin the blame on the horrified poster, but fortunately, the cameras revealed the real culprit
Image credits: Throwawayonionrings2
Image credits: prostock-studio / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The damage was already done, and the poster couldn't take it anymore, so she snapped at A, booked her a car, and left her in the parking lot
Image credits: Throwawayonionrings2
Image credits: prostooleh / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Everyone was furious at her for abandoning her "best friend" with a wheelchair like that, so she started wondering whether she was wrong
Image credits: Throwawayonionrings2
However, she quickly realized that it was a toxic friendship, and A was just taking advantage of her at that point, so she broke it off
In today’s story, the 16-year-old original poster (OP) tells us how her 11 years of friendship with her bestie, dubbed “A” in the story, came to an end. When they were 13, A became disabled in an accident and had to start using a wheelchair. It was a really tough time for the two friends. OP also lost her dog at that time, but suppressed her feelings as what happened to A took precedence over that.
She feels that’s when she started resenting her a bit, but little did she know all the drama that would follow. There was a total shift in their relationship, as OP was the one always taking care of A, being there for her, and even doing whatever she asked her to do. In fact, the poor poster couldn’t do a few things, or have new friends, as A might feel bad about it or would be afraid of “losing her”.
The resentment within OP just kept building until one day, it erupted like a volcano. They had gone to the mall when A stole a few clothes and got caught. However, the twist is that she pinned the blame on the shocked poster, and only after the cameras revealed the truth did A admit her fault. That was just crossing the line, so OP finally snapped and took action.
She called a cab for A and ditched her in the parking lot, but then, a lot of people lashed out against the poster. Well, she probably felt guilty about her actions before, but her update was a satisfying one. OP clarified her side of the story to everyone and even ended things with A for good. She and her parents also had a small funeral for her late dog, and they got her a new one as well!
Image credits: Throwawayonionrings2 / Reddit
“A friendship turns into a caregiver–dependent thing when it stops feeling like fun and starts feeling like a job, which is pretty evident in this story. One person ends up doing all the emotional heavy lifting, and over time, it stops being an equal dynamic,” explained Eden Lobo, a counselor and psychology professor whom Bored Panda reached out to for an interview.
She also elaborated that when someone ignores their own needs for years, they often end up feeling drained, resentful, and guilty for wanting space. She thinks that they may lose sight of who they are aside from the “helper” role, struggle to set boundaries, and feel anxious or burnt out. Eventually, all those bottled-up emotions tend to explode or cause the friendship to fall apart, Prof. Lobo added.
Our expert also noted that there is another important angle to the story, which is OP’s resentment. She said, “Unresolved grief can quietly build up and mix with feelings of bitterness or exhaustion, especially when someone’s constantly caring for a friend who seems to be ‘hurting more.’ The teen might feel like her own pain doesn’t matter or isn’t valid.”
No wonder she just snapped one day, considering all the battles that might be going on inside her head. Prof. Lobo added that other people’s constant pushiness for her to be a good friend to the disabled teen, while ignoring her own loss and grief, can also be a factor that led to an outburst.
Well, I truly hope that A at least had the decency to respect OP’s boundary, and didn’t trouble her further. Don’t you think so, too? Let us know your thoughts in the comments below!
People claimed that A sounded very manipulative, and they even called out her selfish behavior for blaming the poster when she was the one who stole the clothes
