Aubrey Plaza’s old story about filming an intimate scene with Robert De Niro has started making the rounds again, years after she first shared the bizarre behind-the-scenes moment.
Plaza recalled how director Dan Mazer would suggest unexpected things for her character to try during takes while filming 2016’s Dirty Grandpa.
The story resurfaced shortly after Plaza became a first-time mother with actor Christopher Abbott.
Highlights
- Aubrey Plaza’s story about filming an intimate scene with Robert De Niro in “Dirty Grandpa” has resurfaced online.
- Plaza recalled director Dan Mazer suggesting an unexpected action during the scene.
- The resurfaced story has sparked fresh discussion about consent, boundaries, and the role of intimacy coordinators during intimate scenes.
The intimate-scene story also divided social media users.
“Now I can understand why an intimacy coordinator is actually a real job. There are some things in life that you can't just wing it,” wrote one commenter.
Aubrey Plaza recalled being asked to try something unexpected with Robert De Niro
Plaza played Lenore, a much younger woman who becomes romantically interested in De Niro’s character, Dick Kelly, in Dirty Grandpa, which also starred Zac Efron.
During a 2016 appearance on Jimmy Kimmel Live!, Plaza explained that some parts of the intimate scene were not fully planned before filming.
She said director Mazer would occasionally call her over between takes and suggest different actions for her character.
“We didn't totally plan out the scene. We didn't know how it was going to go down.”
One suggestion caught Plaza completely off guard.
Mazer reportedly asked her to try sucking on De Niro’s nipples during the next take.
Plaza recalled questioning the request before eventually attempting it.
“And I'd be like, ‘You want me to do it?’ I'd rather not. And then he'd be like, ‘Yeah, suck on his nipples.’”
When Plaza tried the suggestion during the scene, De Niro reportedly pushed her away
Plaza was left confused when De Niro appeared to push her away while she tried on sucking his nipples.
That left her unsure whether his reaction was in character or whether he genuinely didn't want her to continue.
“I’d try to get in there and suck on his nipples, and he was like batting me away, and I didn't know if it was like in character or not, ‘cause you never know.”
The cameras were then stopped, and Mazer explained that De Niro was uncomfortable with that particular approach.
Plaza recalled being told, “Bob does not like his nipple area paid attention to. So, don’t do that.”
Plaza then joked that she was worried De Niro might think she had personally wanted to do it.
“And I was like, great, well now he thinks that I wanted to do that.”
The story has now sparked fresh discussion about how intimate scenes were handled in Hollywood
The resurfaced interview prompted some users to question the lack of clear boundaries in the situation.
One person wrote, “So, his consent is the only thing the director respects, but not her being comfortable doing the scene.”
Another called the situation, “Disgusting. No morals in movies and TV shows at all.”
A third wrote, “Too much information,” while a fourth added, “I would’ve aggressively refused. No thanks.”
The nipple incident was not the only unusual story Plaza later shared about Dirty Grandpa.
According to Plaza, her agent heard that De Niro was “legitimately scared” of her while they were working together.
Plaza believed the issue had more to do with her character than her real personality.
She played Lenore as a 21-year-old woman whose storyline involved trying to seduce De Niro’s character. Plaza reportedly arrived on set already dressed and styled as Lenore, including a wig and bronzed makeup, and remained in character around him before filming.
The actress said the contrast between her onscreen personality and who she was away from the cameras may have unsettled him.
The renewed attention comes during a major personal change for Plaza
Plaza and Abbott reportedly welcomed a baby daughter in late July, making them first-time parents, as reported by Bored Panda.
TMZ published photographs of Plaza carrying a baby in New York after attending Abbott’s final Death of a Salesman performance on Broadway.
The couple had previously worked together on the 2020 psychological drama Black Bear and the Off-Broadway play Danny and the Deep Blue Sea.
News of Plaza’s pregnancy first surfaced in April.
Abbott played Biff Loman in the Broadway revival of Arthur Miller’s Death of a Salesman. At the same time, Plaza has continued her acting career with projects including The White Lotus, Agatha All Along, and Parks and Recreation.
Plaza’s transition into motherhood had also attracted unwanted commentary
The news of Plaza’s pregnancy sparked debate because of her late marriage to filmmaker Jeff Baena.
Plaza and Baena began dating in 2011 and married in 2021.
They separated in September 2024 after what the Los Angeles County Medical Examiner-Coroner’s report described as “recent marital difficulties.”
Baena passed away in January 2025.
When Plaza’s pregnancy with Abbott became public in April 2026, people questioned how quickly she had entered a new relationship and started a family.
Image credits: Good Hang with Amy Poehler
One commenter asked, “Didn't her husband JUST pass away?” while another said, “Everyone grieves differently.”
A third wrote, “Is she supposed to stay unhappy for the rest of her life?”
Plaza herself had previously described grief as a difficult, ongoing experience rather than something that followed a fixed timeline.
Speaking to Amy Poehler on the Good Hang podcast, she said she was functioning and grateful to be moving through the world, while also acknowledging that it remained a “daily struggle.”
She compared grief to a “giant ocean of awfulness” and said that sometimes she wanted to dive into it, while at other times she wanted to run away from it.
“But it’s always there. It’s just always there.”
"Her impression of Robert was hilarious," wrote one netizen
