People Who Had To Use Bar’s Safe Word Or Secret Drink Explain Why And What Happened (28 Examples)

When a person goes out to a bar, they expect a fun, carefree time. Sadly, reality isn’t always so generous. Sometimes, the bar experience turns sour pretty fast, usually due to other people who bug you, make you feel unsafe, or even straightforwardly harass you. After all, intimate harassment, unfortunately, is quite common in settings like bars. 

And so, some bars have safety measures in place that customers can use if they don’t feel safe. Since some situations do not let individuals approach security bluntly without jeopardizing their safety even more, bars have found a way for people to do this subtly. 

It’s in the form of “safe words” or secret drinks. A good example of this is the “Ask Angela” campaign. Basically, when a person feels unsafe, they can ask for Angela, a fictional member of staff, at a bar. With this safe word, staff will help an individual get home discreetly and safely by escorting them to a different room, calling them a cab and leading them to it, or by kicking the dangerous person out. 

This started in England in 2016. To be more specific—in Lincolnshire, by Hayley Crawford, the Substance Misuse and Sexual Violence (prevention) strategic Coordinator for Lincolnshire County Council.

The name Angela was chosen in remembrance of Angela Phillips, a woman who was abused and whose life was taken by her husband in 2012 when an argument got out of control. Additionally, there’s the meaning of “messenger of God” or “angel” in there. 

The word about such safety measures spread quickly and was adopted by other places, like the United States, only with different code words. For example, people can ask for an “Angel Shot,” with additional context like “neat” (escort to a car), “on the rocks" (call a taxi), or “with a lime” (call the police). Depending on the code word and its additions, the bartender will react accordingly and help a person in need. 

Other bars can have different variations of a code word, but the general idea of how it works stands. 

Of course, it wasn’t popularized just in the United States – many countries around the globe took the idea and ran with it – from places in Europe to Australia, South America, and so on. It became a worldwide phenomenon—and a great one. 

On today’s list, you will find plenty of examples of these safe words and secret drinks being used in actual situations, proving that they exist beyond theoretical discussions. All of these stories were shared by people online when someone on Reddit encouraged them to do so. And we’re glad they did—it’s not only interesting to read about, but it also shines a light on how important and useful such safety measures are. 

Have you ever used any bar safe words or secret drinks yourself? Or witnessed someone using them? Don’t shy away from sharing your stories with us!