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To learn more about everyday life lessons, we contacted psychologist Lindsay Staples, PhD, who provides individual therapy for adults exclusively by telehealth to maximize accessibility and convenience.
"Advice is good when it is specific to your situation and considers long-term consequences," Staples shared with Bored Panda.
"It should also support your personal values, provide you with an idea you didn't already have, and be clear exactly what you're supposed to do with it."
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That really helped me through some dark times.
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However, "Advice can also be bad, and some advice can be good in one context but not another," Staples added.
"For example, many an infuriated millennial has complained about their boomer parents advising them to 'Show up and ask the employers if they have any jobs in person! It will leave an impression!' But maybe that's not the impression they're going for. That advice applied to the parents' situation but doesn't apply now."
"Advice can also be bad if it's based on flawed information or doesn't account for long-term risks. Exercise caution if, for example, someone seems just a little too excited about Bitcoin." Otherwise, you might lose your savings in a pump-and-dump scheme.
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Alternatively, I was told once, after considering myself a fairly honorable man, when I did something wrong, a friend told me "being a good man isnt a thing. It's a journey".
Research has demonstrated that we are likely to favor our own judgment over others' advice, especially when we don't know those people. And that's not necessarily a problem because Staples believes the source of the advice is pretty darn important.
"You need to know: 1) Can you trust the intentions of the person giving the advice—do they actually want to be helpful? 2) What are they claiming to know, and how do they know it? (Life experience? Citable sources?) And 3) do they understand your situation well enough to have an opinion?"
So don't worry if some of these entries don't apply to you!
#8
There will be times when they won't give as much, out of sickness or sadness or whatever reason. Instead of feeling like they should do more, just pick up the slack. There will be times when you can't do your share either.
Dishes need doing? Do them.
Instead of asking whether they're doing enough, ask if you can do more. Serve them. Give them yourself. If both people do this, it will be a happy marriage.
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“If you’re the smartest person in the room, you’re in the wrong room”
The people who you surround yourself with especially in your young adult life will have a profound impact on the rest of your adulthood.
Surrounding yourself with driven and intelligent people will influence you positively.
#12
If the process operator is convinced that the power is shut off, go and see it for yourself.
If a trainee tells you he has tightened all and any bolts and screws, go and see it for yourself.
If your foreman sounds convincing enough that the materials for the job are ordered, go and see it for yourself.
It's a philosophy not for sowing mistrust, but to ensure you can do your job properly and safely.
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It really resonated with me, since I grew up with instability and uncertainty.
#15
Wisdom from my boss on having a huge to-do list at work and not stressing over it. Get done what you can today, what you don't finish will be there to work on tomorrow and you don't need to take the mental baggage of having a big to-do list home with you.
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