Being alone and spending time in nature can be one of the most relaxing experiences. You can enjoy the peace and revel in the beautiful sights without being disturbed. Although, sometimes, you may not even get to do that if another person objects to you spending time by yourself.
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A woman found herself in this situation after she booked a luxurious and spacious cabin to spend a few nights relaxing with her dog. Unfortunately, the rental company had other ideas and expected her to downsize to a glamping pod instead.
Just because you’re spending time by yourself doesn’t mean you have to take up less space to please other people
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The poster’s favorite tradition after escaping her ex is to go away for a few nights to a beautiful location just to recharge, so this time, she chose a lovely 6-person lodge to stay in
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The woman received an email from the rental company asking her if she’d book a glamping pod instead since October is their busiest time, and they usually only rent cabins to big groups
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
She realized the company probably wanted to make more money off big parties, but felt it was her right to book the place as she planned to spend an additional £95 apart from the booking fee
Image credits: IslandHopper X / Freepik (not the actual photo)
After netizens encouraged her to stand up for what she wanted, she emailed the company, and they fortunately responded in a welcoming and positive manner
Image credits: MaryRoze
The initial hurdle while booking wasn’t the only problem she faced because when she got there, her neighbors were noisy, a mouse ate her food, and she received a large list of weird rules
In this particular situation, the OP luckily didn’t face lot of pushback from the company when she clarified that she wanted the cabin. Although they initially hassled her about it, they eventually welcomed her there. This isn’t exactly the norm for most single people looking to rent a place or do an activity by themselves; they often face a lot more discrimination than you’d imagine.
To get an expert’s perspective on this, Bored Panda contacted Bella DePaulo (PhD, Harvard). She is the author of ‘Single at Heart: The Power, Freedom, and Heart-Filling Joy of Single Life,’ and has been described by Atlantic magazine as ‘America's foremost thinker and writer on the single experience.’
Her TEDx talk, ‘What no one ever told you about people who are single,’ has been viewed more than 1.7 million times. Bella shared her experience of renting a place as a single individual and stated: “I went to an open house for a spacious home. The realtor showing the house, upon learning that I was single, encouraged me to look instead at a townhouse he was trying to sell.”
“What is ironic about this is that if he succeeded in convincing me to buy the townhouse instead (he didn’t), he would have made far less profit. The second example was from a time when I was looking for a place to rent.”
“One of the places had 3 bedrooms. When the owner learned that I was single and had no kids, she said she would only show me the place if I explained to her why I needed 3 bedrooms. I did not bother responding and found a different place,” she shared.
The original poster shared some pretty damning evidence of mouse activity, if you've ever cohabited with the little critters
Image credits: MaryRoze
It might seem like a single woman has to jump through a lot of hoops to be able to rent a place. The OP also had to make it known that she was willing to pay £95 extra and then only the company seemed willing to let her use the big lodge. Despite this apparent discrimination, author and relationship writer Carlyn Beccia has a different perspective.
She said that “single people are definitely discriminated against, but rental housing is the one area where it pays to be single. Every property owner like myself knows the risk: couples break up and fight. A single person will be quieter, neater, and less likely to try to break a lease.”
Most experts feel differently about the topic. Elyakim Kislev, the author of ‘Happy Singlehood: The Rising Acceptance and Celebration of Solo Living,’ said that “what stands behind such discrimination is that landlords or property managers may prefer couples or families, assuming they are more stable or financially secure. Single individuals, in contrast, are considered less stable.”
Elaine Hoan, a PhD student studying the experiences of singles, explained that “it’s not uncommon that landlords prioritize renting to couples, especially married couples, who they assume have a more stable income. These experiences could be worsened if the single person is also a person of color or depending on your geographical location.”
She provided an example of Jesook Song’s book that “explains how in South Korea, the hiring practices and gender pay gap alongside double standards about men and women’s promiscuity when living alone, makes moving out and affording rental properties incredibly difficult for young women.”
It goes to show that this simple situation with OP wanting to rent out a lodge to relax in could actually have so much more going on under the surface.
According to Elyakim, some ways to overcome this discrimination include “engaging with communities that support and celebrate solo living. Another is actively pushing back against stereotypes about singles by embracing and promoting singlehood as a legitimate and rewarding lifestyle.”
Image credits: Ali Kazal / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Bella has also conducted research on housing discrimination faced by single people. She and her colleagues found that there were “clear biases toward wanting to rent to a married couple as compared to a single man, a single woman, a cohabiting couple, or a pair of friends. The married couple applicants were always greatly favored over the others.”
This just goes to show that maybe the rental company was initially biased against the OP and did not want a single woman and her dog to have the cabin to themselves. Money might have also been an issue because once she clarified how much she was planning to spend, they got over their initial prejudice.
The poster learned her lesson about renting a lodge from such a company after her less-than-comfortable experience. She didn’t realize she’d also be rooming with a mouse or having to pay £5 extra to empty each bin bag. Even though her stay wasn’t great, it’s good that she was able to rent the lodge out just for herself.
Bella told us that “this issue of housing discrimination against single people is just one example of what I call ‘singlism’ [which is] the stereotyping, stigmatizing, and discrimination against people who are single.”
“It does not just happen in the housing market. There is also singlism in the workplace, the marketplace, the health care system, politics, popular culture, and just about every other domain of life. As the number of single people continues to grow in the US and many other nations around the world, the unfair treatment of single people is going to get challenged more often,” she stated.
People should be allowed to take up space, even if they’re just by themselves, without anyone questioning them about it. That’s why organizations like Unmarried Equality work tirelessly for single people’s rights. It’s probably an issue you’ve never really considered before, but hopefully, the OP’s experience made you really think about it.
What would you have done differently compared to the poster? Share your thoughts in the comments.
People were shocked by the woman’s abysmal experience trying to book the lodge and then actually staying in it
