It is beyond confusing when you think that your romantic relationship is thriving when, in fact, your partner is secretly cheating on you. This is what happened to redditor u/Unlucky_Amoeba_2473, who got proof that her boyfriend of 7 years, someone she was planning to get married to, was unfaithful.
The woman turned to the Relationship Advice online community for practical advice on how to disappear from his life, and cut him out for good. And the internet delivered.
Keep reading for the full story, including an important follow-up. Meanwhile, Bored Panda has reached out to the author for comment, and we’ll update the article once we hear back from her.
When you find irrefutable proof that your partner has been unfaithful to you, you have to decide how to move forward
Image credits: maksymiv / envato (not the actual photo)
One woman decided to completely disappear from her cheating boyfriend's life while he was traveling. She turned to the internet for help. Here's her story
Image credits: bnenin / envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Unlucky_Amoeba_2473
Drastic changes in your partner's mood, routine, habits, or intimacy can indicate that something secretive is going on
It can be humiliating to learn that your significant other has been telling their family and friends that they’ve been broken up with you for months, while you’re still together.
As tough as it is, if you no longer want to be with someone, the right thing to do is to sit down and have a face-to-face conversation so you can both move forward. In that case, there’s at least a chance of breaking up amicably.
The wrong move is clearly what the guy did in this case: hoping that his partner won’t find out about his infidelity while still staying in a relationship with her.
It’s not fair to his significant other. It’s not fair to the other women he’s dating. And it’s also not fair to his family and friends whom he’s lying to about his actual relationship.
It can be hard to pick up on the fact that your partner may be unfaithful to you. Some signs are very clear, but others are far more subtle and only obvious in retrospect.
As a rule of thumb, if there are sudden changes in your partner’s behavior and habits, it might (emphasis on ‘might’) be an indication that they’re cheating on you. Though, keep in mind, that, for instance, stress at work or problems in their personal life may cause them to behave differently, too.
As Choosing Therapy points out, one potential sign of cheating is if your partner has drastic changes in their mood. “If your partner is usually relaxed or laid-back and suddenly becomes uptight, withdrawn, on edge, or easily agitated, it could be a sign that they are hiding something.”
Something else to look out for are major changes in routine, secret friendships, gaslighting, them complaining about you, and being overprotective of their electronic devices.
Proof of cheating is often found on electronic devices. If your significant other is increasingly protective of their tech, browsing history, and passwords, it's very suspicious
Image credits: A. C. / envato (not the actual photo)
If you’re worried about your relationship, there’s no better tool at your disposal than a heart-to-heart conversation. Nobody is a mind-reader.
Get on the same page. Figure out why there might be some lingering tension between the two of you. And then look for ways to either compromise or collaborate going forward.
According to Verywell Mind, some of the most common signs of cheating include the following:
- Changes in communication and attitude
- A sudden, increased interest in one’s appearance
- Spending more time away from home
- Lying
- Avoidance and indifference
- Changes in your intimate life
- Money issues
- Accusing you of cheating
- Changes in their use of technology
You can tell a lot about a person by their tech use. Internet infidelity is common. And you can often find proof about your significant other’s cheating on their phone or computer.
Some major red flags to look out for are if your partner suddenly becomes unreachable during certain times of the day, they change their passwords and don’t share them with you, and sneak off to text or take calls.
Other things that should concern you are if they suddenly switch off cloud sharing on various devices, stop using shared devices, reduce their social media use, clear their browsing history, and their fitness tracker shows them exercising during odd times.
What would you do if you were in the author’s shoes and found out that your long-term partner is cheating on you, Pandas? What do you think of the advice the internet gave the woman on disappearing from her boyfriend’s life? Is there anything else that you’d do to cut the person out of your life? Share your thoughts in the comments below.
The internet soon rushed in with practical, useful advice for the distraught woman
Image credits: Lazy_Bear / envato (not the actual photo)
Later, the woman shared an update about how she cut her (now ex) boyfriend out of her life, and what the fallout was like
Image credits: Unlucky_Amoeba_2473
Here's how readers reacted to the new twists in the story
