In a relationship, you not only trust the person you're with, but you also believe that they know everything about you. Well, maybe not every single detail ever, but the most important things that define who you are for sure.
That's what the woman in today's story hoped too – that her boyfriend knew how much she struggled with trusting people. And so, she went out on a date with him, not expecting it to shake everything they had with a prank she was not ready for.
More info: Reddit
In a relationship, you hope that the person you're with knows you in and out
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Like this woman, who believed that her boyfriend knew about her trust issues
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
She trusted him enough to start planning a future with him
Image credits: cottonbro studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)
One day, they went out on a date when suddenly he got on one knee and proposed, and then they quickly got married in an interactive museum
Image credits: Timur Weber / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Throughout the whole ceremony, she was questioning if it was real, but trusted her boyfriend when he said it was
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
But then he revealed that it wasn't and laughed at her being gullible
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
This made the woman question the whole relationship – he should've known how hard it was for her to deal with her trust issues
Image credits: anonymous
Later on, he apologized and owned up to his mistakes, but the sentiment in her mind still remained
The OP and her boyfriend had been together for under a year, but they were genuinely great. They already lived together, had a cat, had met each other's families, and had even discussed further commitment healthily and realistically, and were on the same page about it, realizing how serious it is. Or at least that’s what the author thought.
One day, the couple went out to dinner and then to an interactive museum in Los Angeles. They had planned it all beforehand, so the woman was excited, and everything was going well. Then, towards the end of the museum tour, a staff member asked them to meet him down the hall after around 10 minutes or so.
When they did, they found a staff member dressed like an officiant who asked them if they wanted to get married right then and there. The boyfriend got on one knee and asked her the same question. All of this took the OP by surprise. She said yes, so they went through with the full ceremony.
After it, when the woman once again asked her boyfriend if it was real, he just laughed and called her gullible. This made her feel humiliated and foolish for trusting him. Yes, the situation was sketchy, but she was taken by surprise, and she trusted him, and that’s what made it all so bad.
Granted, later on, he apologized for his poor judgment, but the bitter taste in the woman’s mouth remained – by this point, he should have known her well enough not to have done something like that. Basically, her complete trust in him was shattered.
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
The tricky thing about trust is that it can be broken by even the slightest incident, if it’s timed wrongly, happens in the wrong place, or just to a sensitive person. And the OP has established that she is sensitive, thus a person who truly knows her should take this into consideration.
When trust is broken, the emotional safety within the relationship is shattered as well. And while it will be hard to fix it, it’s not an impossible task. But an important one for sure – without a repair process, the relationship simply cannot flourish.
This process takes time, and its form varies from couple to couple and depends on the incident that caused its need. For instance, for some, it might be enough to say sorry and then show that you care. For others, sizable changes in behavior are needed to start to trust again. And for some, therapy is the only answer.
Well, maybe for everyone it can be one – you don’t have to go there only when you have major problems; it can be a helpful t**l with minuscule issues as well. After all, we should always try to look for ways to be the best versions of ourselves.
At the same time, some netizens thought that this woman should dump her boyfriend without much thought or attempts to repair it – he violated her trust. But she explained that their situation isn’t so black and white – it’s somewhere in between, thus, at least currently, they’re not going their separate ways.
Do you agree with these netizens that she should leave him, or do you stand by her side and believe it’s more complicated than that? We’re eager to hear your opinions!
Some netizens expressed that they wouldn't stay with a man like that, but the woman explained that their whole deal wasn't black and white like that
