It is common for the host to encourage their guests to “feel at home”, yet welcoming a guest puts trust in the guest's overall reasonableness to not infringe on another person’s private space without permission. For this reason, visitors lacking such understanding might be reminded later that despite feeling at home, one shouldn’t forget “being a guest”.
So happened to this Redditor, who had her boyfriend’s mother and his sister visiting their house and criticizing every single detail for not being “high class”, yet failing to apply these standards to their own behavior as guests, and thus making the homeowner end their visit abruptly.
More info: Reddit
A boyfriend's mom and his sister came to visit the couple's new place, but were asked to leave soon after
Image credits: Phil Hearing (not the actual photo)
This woman moved in with her boyfriend who comes from a wealthy family with a luxurious lifestyle
Image credits: Throwaway1828490
Image credits: The-Lore (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Throwaway1828490
Image credits: Carrie Allen (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Throwaway1828490
The mom and sister commented that the house was too small, the couches looked and felt cheap, the countertop was hideous, etc.
Image credits: Patrick Perkins (not the actual photo)
After criticizing the couple's bed, the guests moved to going through the couple's dresser drawers
A woman brought it to Reddit when her boyfriend’s mom and sister’s visit didn’t go exactly as most of them would have probably preferred it and her boyfriend didn't like how she dealt with it.
The woman explained that she has just moved in with her boyfriend of two years who comes from a wealthy family that, contrary to the couple’s way of living, has a luxurious lifestyle. The man’s family collects expensive artwork, has a chef and a maid, buys things from the most expensive stores, etc.
This man’s family, namely his mother and his sister, recently came to visit the couple's new place for the first time. They started with a comment on the house being too small and proceeded to criticize every single detail of the house - there wasn’t enough artwork, the couches looked and felt cheap, the countertop was hideous, etc.
The “assessment” continued with comments on the type of glass used on the shower door and the couple’s bed, and reached its culmination as the two women started rifling through the couple’s drawers.
The homeowner asked the women to stop, as these were her personal items, but instead of apologizing, the women responded by accusing the homeowner of “having something to hide”.
At this point, the homeowner asked her boyfriend’s mother and sister to leave, which her boyfriend approved. Yet, after the man’s mother and sister left in disbelief, the couple took their time to resolve the conflict between themselves about who had the right to stop and ask the women out.
The woman asked them to not go through her personal items, but was accused of "having something to hide"
Image credits: Timur Weber (not the actual photo)
The woman had had enough and asked the guests to leave, leading to her boyfriend's criticism for not consulting him first
Curiously enough, Nypost noted in their article that two-thirds of Americans have told their guest to “make themselves at home” and regretted it later, in addition to providing the statistics of a survey with 2,000 respondents from which a third admitted to having told someone they're a “bad guest.”
And while it depends a lot on the dynamics of a relationship with each specific guest, Real Simple listed some general guidelines on how to “win the best houseguest award”, get invited back, or simply make the stay pleasant not just for you, but for your host as well.
The tips for guest behavior included being clear about the length of one’s stay - simply agreeing on it in advance without being vague or hoping to extend your stay once you arrive. While a host might extend an offer, it isn’t a good idea to make assumptions, as the last thing a nice guest would want to do is to take advantage of their host.
Similarly, the guest isn’t advised to show up unannounced or with a pet, child, significant other, or friend (even a mutual one) if it wasn’t cleared with a host beforehand.
Real Simple also brought up that observing or inquiring gently about the main house rules, such as taking shoes off indoors or keeping one’s phone away from the dinner table, might be helpful, in addition to following such polite things to do as limiting one’s phone use, being extremely helpful and at least somewhat self-sufficient.
Coming back to the woman’s story, Redditors judged the guests and not the homeowner to be a jerk here, noting that refraining from opening drawers with personal things without the homeowner’s permission is a well-known rule.
What’s your take on the situation? Did you have a similar experience with guests acting rudely while at your place? Share your experience in the comments.
Redditors shared their takes on the situation
