Couple’s Bizarre Requests And Inappropriate Pre-Wedding Cards Upset Family And Guests

Sometimes, inviting everyone you’d like to see at your wedding is simply impossible; be it because of financial or other constraints, an extensive list might have to be cut down a little.

When this redditor’s cousin was planning their big day, they realized that they couldn’t invite everyone they wanted, so they decided to send out ‘you’re uninvited’ cards. That alone was puzzling to the redditor, but what took them aback even more was that the soon-to-be-married handed out tasks for those who did make it to the invitee list. Scroll down to find the full story below.

Until you find yourself in that position, you might think that wedding planning is nothing but fun and romantic (particularly if you have dreamt about the big day since the 5th grade). But it can also get incredibly stressful, or even upsetting, too, especially when you realize that you can’t have certain things you dreamt of while in said 5th grade; like 300 people on the invitee list.

Being an adult and realizing that there’s finances at play, too (and not only dreams and ideas scribbled in the dusty scrapbook), might significantly influence certain wedding-related decisions. That’s why it’s crucial for the happy couple to discuss their wedding budget in advance and make sure they’re on the same page.

Studies on people’s financial goals reveal that quite a few couples not only discuss finances before the wedding, but join them before saying “I do”, too. According to A Brides & Investopedia study from 2021, close to half of surveyed couples in the US, who are planning their wedding, already have joint accounts before the big day; three-in-five of them say that they regularly talk about money, too.

If you’re wondering how big of a chunk weddings tend to take from a couple’s budget, The Knot revealed that the average cost of a wedding last year stood at around $35,000 USD. According to said source, the venue and the catering seem to be the two largest financial burdens; and bearing in mind that the size of both is directly linked to the number of guests, it’s no surprise that they might require shortening the invitee list a little.

If you’re now wondering about the size of the invitee list, a year ago, the average number on such a list was 115. The Knot reports that the majority of happy couples—57%, to be exact—invite 101+ guests to celebrate their big day; close to a third (30%) invite somewhere between 51 and 100, and only 13% of couples opt for a celebration of less than 50 people.

While sending a ‘Save the Date’ card for people on the guest list—no matter how big or small—is a usual practice, handing out ‘You’re Not Invited’ cards is arguably not that common. That’s likely why the redditor was rather surprised to hear that that’s exactly what her relative did. In addition to that, they also had tasks assigned to those who did make it to the ‘invited’ column, which the OP was quite puzzled over. Fellow redditors found that odd, too; they shared their views in the comments.