Your wedding is supposed to be magical. But you’re meant to be celebrating the love between you and your soulmate, instead of looking for fights to pick with your relatives.
Redditor u/just-curiou1 shared how her bridezilla of a cousin went nuclear when she saw her dressed in burgundy, one of the approved dress code colors. What started seemingly innocent enough soon turned nasty as the toxic bride flung awful and unfounded accusations. Scroll down for the full scoop, and for a reminder to be grateful you’ve (probably) never had to deal with something this bad.
Meanwhile, Bored Panda has reached out to the author for comment, and we’ll update the article as soon as we hear back from her.
Some happy couples ask their guests to follow a dress code and wear clothes of specific colors. It feels awfully wrong to be punished for listening to them
Image credits: Joeyy Lee (not the actual photo)
A woman shared the horrendous experience she had when her bridezilla of a cousin lashed out at her for wearing a burgundy dress. Here's the full story, from the start
Image source: just-curiou1
Image credits: Alexander Mass (not the actual photo)
Image source: just-curiou1
Your well-being, health, and peace of mind should be your top priorities. Don't let someone toxic ruin your life because of their personal issues
Image credits: Getty Images (not the actual photo)
Nobody should have to be in a situation like the one that u/just-curiou1 found herself in. Not only did her cousin accuse her of trying to seduce her husband and of being obsessed with him, but she also kept ratcheting up the tension every time they spoke.
Now, the right thing to do would be for the bridezilla to apologize for her deeply disgusting behavior and hope that, in time, her cousin will be able to forgive her. Maybe a bit of therapy would help her become more self-aware of her entitlement, narcissism, and conflictive personality traits.
But it’s unlikely that she’ll suddenly be the bigger person when she seems to enjoy the drama and has tried to browbeat her entire family into accepting her confabulated narrative.
While it can be painful to go no contact with someone you’ve known most of your life, if they constantly disrespect you, ignore your boundaries, make you feel awful, and behave irrationally, it’s probably the healthiest thing to do.
If someone is actively trying to ruin your life, spending less time around them is a no-brainer. It sends a clear message that you refuse to be disrespected and that their actions will have corresponding consequences.
Your physical, mental, and emotional well-being should be at the top of your priority list. And that means having the courage not only to communicate your boundaries to your social circle, but also to enforce them.
Going no-contact with someone is a pretty big step. However, you should be willing to protect your boundaries in this way if you've tried the alternatives
Image credits: A. C. (not the actual photo)
According to clinical psychologist Dr. Lindsay C. Gibson, it can take some people years to realize how dysfunctional their relationships are because they grew up in chaotic and enmeshed families.
“Sometimes, our internal growth makes it so that we really can no longer tolerate things that we used to not be even aware of,” Gibson explained to Business Insider.
Going no-contact with someone is usually a tough, last-resort decision, once you’ve tried every other avenue. Often, people gradually distance themselves from their problematic relatives rather than cutting them out of their lives on a whim.
Some red flags to keep in mind when considering whether to go no-contact with someone include things like:
- Your bad, tense, and unhealthy experiences with them outweigh all the good interactions
- Any political disagreements between you and them aren’t handled well, and they lead to deeper issues
- Your boundaries continue to be violated
- They have been physically, psychologically, or emotionally violent toward you
- They guilt-trip you for setting basic boundaries
Gibson notes that going no-contact isn’t permanent. It can be a time-out of sorts. There are times when people simply need a break from each other and the stress they bring. “You are beginning to set this norm in the relationship that 'I decide how much contact I want to have or how much contact is good for me,'” the psychologist told BI.
How do you protect your peace, dear Pandas? Have you ever had to go no-contact with a family member or friend before? How would you react if a relative of yours screamed at you for wearing something that matched their wedding dress code? What advice would you give the young woman who had to deal with the bridezilla’s wrath? Share your advice and hard-won wisdom in the comments below.
Many readers were shocked by how quickly the wedding drama escalated
Later, the woman shared an important update. Things with her toxic cousin got even worse than before
Image credits: Getty Images (not the actual photo)
Image source: just-curiou1
Image source: just-curiou1
Here's how some internet users reacted to the next chapter of the story
In yet another update, the woman revealed what the fallout has been like and what she has decided to do going forward
Image credits: Karolina Grabowska (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Karolina Grabowska (not the actual photo)
Image source: just-curiou1
And here's what the author's loyal readers had to say next
