Organizing a wedding is overwhelming enough as it is, and the happy couple certainly doesn’t need any additional stress. However, some family drama is almost inevitable if there are folks whom you don’t want watching you walk down the aisle.
An anonymous bride-to-be took to the AITA forum to ask for advice about her upcoming wedding. She shared that she refuses to invite her stepmom because of the way that she’d previously broken up their entire family after starting an emotional affair that turned into a physical one. Read on for the full story and the internet’s reactions.
When couples envision their wedding day, they probably imagine themselves surrounded only by their loved ones
Image credits: Alexander Mass (not the actual photo)
A bride-to-be asked the internet for some advice after explaining why she categorically refuses to invite her stepmom to her Big Day
Image credits: Ketut Subiyanto (not the actual photo)
Image source: [deleted]
Nobody should feel like they're forced to invite guests who they utterly loathe to their wedding
Image credits: Leeloo The First (not the actual photo)
At the end of the day, no matter how you spin things, it’s the happy couple that’s responsible for the guest list. If you’re paying for the entire wedding out of your pocket, it’s only fair that you get to decide who comes to cheer you on.
If it’s a small wedding with a very limited budget, it makes sense that you invite only the people closest and dearest to you. If you’re more flexible with the size of the celebration and finances, you can consider inviting your third cousin’s family, your colleagues, and your lukewarm acquaintances.
Meanwhile, if some of your relatives are financing the wedding (whether in full or just in part), they do have at least some say in who gets invited. The guest list then becomes a discussion and you might need to have some flexibility.
Whatever the case might be, though, if there’s someone whose presence would actively ruin the joyous mood of your Big Day, it’s best not to invite them. This can pose a bit of a conundrum if they’re a relative’s partner.
If someone doesn't have your best interests at heart and refuses to communicate, you don't owe it to them to extend an olive branch
Image credits: KATRIN BOLOVTSOVA (not the actual photo)
That being said, you would assume that your relatives would have your interests at heart and would be mature enough not to force some haphazard reconciliation with the problematic individual. If someone doesn’t care about you, doesn’t communicate with you, and doesn’t give a damn about you being seriously ill—they don’t deserve a wedding invite. As simple as that.
They haven’t proven that they care about you. Nor have they even attempted to bridge the gap by personally reaching out.
Unfortunately, we were unable to reach out to the author of the viral story for an update because she deleted her account. Hopefully, she’ll be able to stand her ground and focus on what makes her happy, instead of compromising all of her interests just to keep the peace.
It's not just physical affairs that can damage a relationship. Emotional cheating is corrosive, too
Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)
Emotional affairs can be just as devastating as—if not more than—physical affairs. The former refers to situations where a person is emotionally intimate with another individual without this leading to sex. Not all emotional cheating leads to physical intimacy, but this is not an excuse to engage in it.
TechReport states that for 88% of women, emotional cheating is worse than a physical affair. Furthermore, men are more offended than women when their significant others engage in emotional affairs.
Meanwhile, 91% of women admitted that they’ve had an emotional affair, compared to 77% of men. Most emotional cheating (60% of cases) starts in the workplace, where there’s regular contact between people who spend a large chunk of the day around each other.
What would you do if you were in the story author’s shoes? Would you give in and invite someone you would hate to see at your wedding? Or would you stand your ground and stick to your vision of the Big Day? Tell us how you’d handle the situation and what advice you’d give the bride-to-be in the comments.
The internet was overwhelmingly on the author's side. Here's what they told the woman
