A bride who received $100 as a wedding gift rejected the idea of sending a “thank you” note and moving on; instead, she gave a piece of her mind to the wedding guest for transferring the amount two days after she tied the knot.
The enraged newlywed felt that her friend transferred $100 to her as an “afterthought,” and she contacted them to express her disappointment over the “tactless” gift.
Highlights
- A bride returned a $100 Venmo wedding gift she received two days after the wedding, calling it "tactless"
- The friend apologized for arriving late to the wedding and explained that they thought Venmo was preferred
- People on social media were divided, with some siding with the bride and others feeling the friend was reasonable
“Hey, so I got your $100 Venmo gift a couple of days after the wedding and honestly... kinda shocked and bummed about it. Feels a bit disrespectful,” the bride wrote, according to a screenshot of her message that was posted on Reddit.
The recently married wife expressed her frustration over the friend arriving late and not even bothering to attach a card with the $100 gift. Moreover, she felt that the friend expecting $225 from each guest for their birthday party added fuel to the fire.
“Not only were you late to my ceremony, but the absence of a card just added to it. Your recent birthday invite asked for $225 each and I would've done it without a second thought if I weren't getting married,” the bride said.
“Yet, receiving just $100 for MY WEDDING felt like an afterthought and a bit tactless,” she added.
A furious bride lashed out at her friend for sending a $100 Venmo gift two days after the wedding
Image credits: Freepik/stockking
Putting her foot down, the woman revealed that she did not want to keep the $100 Venmo gift and said she sent it back.
“I returned the money because keeping it felt more hurtful than the initial disappointment. I suggest taking a hard look at your relationships. If this is how you value friendships, it's genuinely disheartening,” she wrote.
As per screenshots shared on Reddit in the now-deleted post, the friend had replied to the angry bride and apologized for the way their gift made her feel.
“Hi, I’m so sorry you feel that way, it was not my intention at all!! As a single person who does not drink, I’ve always given $100 as a wedding gift to my friends, in addition to shower gifts. Additionally, I truly thought Venmo was the preferred method since it was what was on the registry when i checked it before the shower,” the friend said in response.
The wedding guest explained that they specifically planned their international travel in such a way that they would be able to attend the wedding.
“I arranged my international travel specifically so that i was able to be in town for your wedding as originally i was not going to be. I also sincerely apologize for the tardiness to the ceremony,” the reply said.
Receiving the $100 Venmo for her wedding felt like “an afterthought and a big tactless,” the angry newlywed said
Image credits: Pexels/Dimitri Kuliuk
Image credits: Pexels/Jeremy Wong
The apologetic friend pointed out that they drove to the wedding with two other friends and also pinned the blame for being late on someone else because they were “not ready on time.”
“But I don’t blame you for being upset at all of us for this,” the friend added.
“I love both [of] you so much and was so thrilled to be there for your big day, I hope you can understand where I am coming from too,” the friend concluded.
People on social media were divided over the wedding gift complaints, with some siding with the bride, while others felt the friend was being the voice of reason in the situation.
"I can see where she’s coming from, if you expect people to pay 225 per person to attend a party you host in your honor and give 100 to do the same for theirs. Tardiness to a wedding is rude no matter whose fault it is,” one Reddit user said. “If you’re friends, you talk through these hurt feelings and apologize to move past it. It’s normal to disagree with friends occasionally - it matters how we address and work through it.”
The bride declared that she was returning the $100 to the friend because she found it "genuinely disheartening"
Image credits: Reddit/weddingshaming
“Talk is cheap. It costs her nothing to say 'I TOTALLY would have paid $225 to attend your party.' She didn’t, though,” another said. “...Now you know that the bride would rather make you feel bad about not even missing or interrupting the ceremony, just so she has something to complain and be the victim about, than have $100 and say thank you. I think you got a full refund and a receipt for a relationship that isn’t worth worrying about.”
“The bride is rude and a birthday party where people have to pay $225 to attend is also tacky af,” a third Reddit user said.
“Etiquette allows wedding gifts up to the first year of marriage. Sending a Venmo without a card is tacky. Showing up late to a wedding is crass,” another wrote. “Sending the Venmo back with a text is rude. You all are ill mannered and self centered.”
The wedding guest responded to the bride's long-winded rant and apologized for the tardiness
Image credits: Reddit/weddingshaming
People on Facebook pointed out, “Gifts should be given without conditions and also graciously received.”
Others who refused to join Team Bride said, “The Bride seems petty and hung up on relatively small things. Good luck to her new Husband!”
“Wow self entitled and self important. Ettiquette say[s] you can send a gift after a wedding. A cash gift is nice There is no dollar amount set. The bride should have written a thank you and gotten over herself,” one said.
Weddings certainly can be a costly affair; throwing an extravagant one would come at a heavy price tag but attending one is also a pinch on the pocket for guests.
According to a Bankrate survey from last year, wedding guests said they would spend an average of $611 per wedding, including an average travel and accommodation budget of $287, while $180 would be set aside for gifts. About $144 would be spent on attire and grooming, the respondents said.
"People talk a lot about how expensive it is to organize a wedding — and it is — but sometimes the cost of attending is understated," said Ted Rossman, senior industry analyst at Bankrate. "It can really add up, especially if you’re invited to multiple weddings in a given year."
The internet was divided over the altercation, with some joining Team Bride and others taking the friend's side
