Tensions Run High As Family Is Accused Of Being “Cheap” For Refusing To Fund $37k Dinner

Weddings are supposed to be this happy, exuberant time for a couple, their friends and families to explore their love for each other. However, some families have very specific ideas of what a wedding should look like and, inevitably, what it should cost.

A woman detailed the extensive family drama that erupted when her in-laws began to demand a particularly expensive rehearsal dinner and luxury hotel. Readers did their best to give some suggestions and called out the entitled demands. We got in touch with the woman who shared the story and she was kind enough to answer some questions.

Bored Panda got in touch with the woman who shared the story and she was kind enough to answer some questions. Firstly, we wanted to hear her reaction to the internet's support. "I think that this post was relatable for a lot of people - many of us have been on the receiving end of unreasonable demands from others in the past. I also think that people were surprised to hear that the bride’s parents are being so pushy (I think typically, it’s the groom’s parents who are more likely to cause issues while wedding planning). Also, the idea of a $37K rehearsal dinner is absurd for most people! It’s not often that you hear about people demanding such extravagance."

We were also curious to hear her opinion on why some folks insisted on such an expensive wedding. "I think that for a lot of people (and especially women), their wedding is something they look forward to for their entire life. I know lots of women my age (23) who grew up making Pinterest boards for their future wedding, starting when they were as young as 8 or 9. This can lead to some lofty expectations once you do get engaged. In this case, the bride is also the first one of her siblings to get married - so her parents probably have a lot of expectations for her day to be perfect, as well. Unfortunately, I think many people forget what the day is supposed to be about in the first place - the couples’ love, and their family coming together."

Based on a survey conducted by the Knot, the average wedding in the US cost a staggering $35,000. Even more surprisingly, this is roughly a $5000 increase from 2022, cementing the fact that people who want big weddings will get them, cost be damned. It’s important to note that this, already significant, price covers the entire thing.

The average, total, cost per guest was $304, which would mean that the proposed wedding would be spending half of that alone on just catering. It’s important to note that both this price and the aforementioned one are averages from a list that even includes destination weddings from as far abroad as Italy.

The in-laws in this story are interested in paying five figures for just the rehearsal dinner. One shudders to think about the total cost of the whole wedding by the end, if these are the standards they are interested in. To be fair, if someone wants a massive, fairytale wedding, fair enough, to each their own.

The real issue is when they start making demands for money from people who either don’t have it or would prefer to not spend that much on what boils down to some food, a party and a hotel stay. Indeed, the vast majority of people would balk at spending $30,000 for the whole wedding, let alone just one part, so calling the family “cheap” is bizarre and deeply entitled. Lets face it, it’s often enough the behavior of the guests, not the wedding that makes or breaks the whole thing.

Indeed, it’s surprising that the woman telling the story even had to turn to the internet for a second opinion. This is a huge amount of money, not something to just be thrown away lightly. While it’s not that weird that a particularly wealthy family would not understand that other people don’t have as much income, calling them cheap when they literally can’t afford it is ludicrous.

Unfortunately, many people have to deal with entitled in-laws. Normally, rude, horrible or just entitled people can be avoided, but a marriage means that, at least briefly, one has to come into contact with folks that it would be best to avoid like the plague. This means dealing with the sort of behavior that one might find unthinkable in day to day life.

All in all, this is pretty questionable behavior and it’s unfortunate that we do not have a source closer to the bride and groom. While in-laws can be a lot more entitled than the literal happy couple, the groom’s family is simply going to be poorer than the brides. This family needs to understand that and work out how they will cover costs in the future.

The actual crux in this marriage will be how the couple handle this sort of situation. The in-laws can make demands, but if the bride sides with the groom’s perspective then tough luck to them. On the other hand, it’s pretty easy to see exactly how this can become a significant pitfall for this marriage.