In an age of affairs and cheaters, there are still some people who take the “in sickness and in health” vow pretty seriously. Obviously, it’s all out of love, but imagine if their kindness is taken for granted by their partner. That’s definitely painful, right?
Well, this woman started feeling underappreciated and taken advantage of after she married her jobless boyfriend so her health insurance would cover his cancer treatment. His pricey demands were burning her out, but he just dismissed it as “no big deal,” until she couldn’t take it anymore! Here’s what happened…
More info: Reddit
It's natural to feel unappreciated if a person is breaking their back to support their partner but gets nothing in return
Image credits: Freepik / Magnific (not the actual photo)
The poster's boyfriend got diagnosed with cancer, so his work contract wasn't extended, but she married him as her health insurance would cover his treatment
Image credits: prostooleh / Magnific (not the actual photo)
It worked out fine as he sat at home while she worked, but suddenly his expensive demands popped up, starting with owning a motorcycle
Image credits: mazharrajpoot / Magnific (not the actual photo)
As he had terminal cancer, the poster hesitated to refuse, but it escalated after he splurged all her money, gambled, and even lied to her about everything
Image credits: Medium-Ad-565
While she knew that he was spiraling because of his disease, the poster felt that he was just taking advantage of her, and dismissing what she had done for him
In today’s tragic story, the original poster (OP) laments how her life has taken a pretty sad turn. It all started when her husband was diagnosed with terminal cancer, so his company refused to extend his work contract. Well, they decided to get married so her health insurance would cover his treatment, and she was fine being the sole breadwinner while he stayed at home.
Things were good at first, but then his expensive demands began. He wanted to own a motorcycle, so the OP asked her mom for money and gave him $8,000. However, when his illness got serious, he insisted on visiting his hometown. A last-minute flight ticket cost her $800 instead of $250, and he also damaged property in a fit of anger, which only added to the expenses.
In his hometown, he gambled away her money and also spoiled his friends with gifts. When she asked him about the motorcycle money, he claimed she had not told him the $8,000 was for it. She was frustrated as he kept dismissing her concerns as “not a big deal.” On top of everything, the guy was also skipping out on his chemo medicine, and snapped when she brought it up.
Well, the author was burned out not just financially, but emotionally as well. After all, she had spent thousands of dollars on him, and also married him for the insurance. In return, there was not a single “thank you” from him, and our lady felt deeply underappreciated. While she was aware that the illness was affecting him, the OP felt that he was dragging her down, too.
Image credits: syda_productions / Magnific (not the actual photo)
Netizens immediately pointed out that the poster was a victim of mistreatment. Experts highlight that financial cruelty is a form of domestic violence, and it can take the form of someone taking away your access to money, manipulating your financial decisions, or using your money without consent. Also, it can make the victims feel vulnerable, isolated, depressed, and anxious.
It was understandable that her husband was struggling because of his cancer, not just physically, but also mentally. Studies emphasize that a terminal cancer diagnosis can be extremely overwhelming for anyone. Patients may experience a mix of emotions such as hope, sadness, depression, grief, fear, worry, anger, guilt, regret, and even loneliness.
Obviously, it’s scary dealing with all that, but that didn’t mean he dismissed his wife the way he did. Researchers stress that “feeling appreciated by your partner is important to maintain a healthy bond. On the other hand, feeling as though your efforts aren’t recognized could lead to relationship conflicts, low self-esteem, lack of motivation, and mental health concerns.”
Peeps online said that if he really loved her, he would be considerate of everything she had done for him. Also, since he was struggling so much mentally, he should have taken her advice and gone to therapy instead of harming her well-being in this way. Some of them felt that marrying him was a mistake. Do you agree with them? Let us know your thoughts in the comments!
Netizens advised the poster to stop being afraid of saying no to him because of his illness, but others were alarmed by his violent behavior
