One of the most beautiful things about being in a relationship is being able to share a life with another person. You get to build a home together, spend every night together, and share personal information that you wouldn’t divulge to anyone else.
But you shouldn’t be expected to share everything with your partner. One woman reached out to the internet for advice when she became fed up with how entitled her boyfriend felt to her food. Below, you’ll find the full story that she posted on Reddit, as well as some of the replies invested readers left her.
Sharing meals together is a great way for couples to bond
But this woman is tired of her boyfriend constantly stealing food from her
Readers warned the woman that her boyfriend was extremely selfish and urged her to end the relationship
Later, the author shared an update on her relationship status
Selfishness can be detrimental to a relationship
When you truly love someone, you’ll be eager to share as much as you can with them. Whether that’s your favorite meal at a restaurant, so they can give it a try, or your deepest, darkest secrets. Building a life with someone means that you have to let them in.
But for this to be successful, the sharing has to go both ways. It’s pointless if one person is required to share everything they have, while the other simply takes, takes, and takes. According to Sonia Alonso at Abstracted Collective, being selfish can quickly ruin a relationship.
She explains that selfish individuals are great at attracting people-pleasers or people who are co-dependent in their relationships. Because of this, they might be more willing to put up with selfish behaviors than others. But this combination can lead to a very unbalanced and unhealthy relationship.
On the other hand, Marriage.com notes that being selfless can be a great way to create a long-lasting, healthy relationship. This requires being able to compromise and place yourself in your partner’s shoes. A selfless partner also knows how to be authentic and practice forgiveness.
You shouldn’t ever remind your partner of the favors you’ve done for them; instead, make it clear that you appreciate what they’ve done for you. Be a great listener, and be willing to go the extra mile for your partner. Perform acts of kindness for them daily without expecting anything in return.
If both partners approach the relationship with this mindset, they will be able to avoid many issues that appear in other relationships when at least one person is acting selfishly. But as with everything in life, there are limits to how selfless one should be with their partner. You shouldn’t let them walk all over you or make all of the decisions in the relationship.
It's important to still take care of yourself while in a relationship
Christine Aiello, LMFT, says that everyone should give themself permission to be a little selfish in their relationships. By this, she means that you should still prioritize your own needs, which can then help you be a better partner.
You can’t pour from an empty cup, right? So don’t burn yourself out trying to do things for your other half every moment of every day. Plus, if your partner truly loves you, they won’t have any problem with you taking care of yourself. They should even encourage it.
Aiello also points out that being a little selfish in your relationships can improve communication and emotional connection. When you voice your concerns, frustrations, and fears, it might feel a bit selfish. However, this allows you and your partner to build a much deeper connection than if you pretended everything was fine to prioritize their comfort.
Meanwhile, as important as sharing is in a relationship, your partner is not entitled to everything you have. Food may seem like a silly example of this, but issues tend to escalate in relationships. If this man is stealing his partner’s dinner without asking her first, he might soon be taking much more.
Boundaries are crucial in any relationship, and if your partner repeatedly crosses them, it might be time to move on. We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. What would you have done if you were in the author’s shoes? Then, if you’re interested in checking out another article from Bored Panda discussing similar relationship issues, look no further than right here.
Readers were appalled by the man's behavior and supported the author's decision to dump him
