Everyone loves parties because it’s a great way for people to come together, socialize, and relax. Children’s functions require a little more effort because parents need to plan everything well and make sure all the kids have fun. This can be difficult, especially if there are special events or return gifts involved.
One mom had planned a lovely birthday party for her son and had amazing goodie bags for the children to take home. Unfortunately, a “Karen” ruined the event by not RSVPing and coming in with big demands.
More info: Mumsnet
Party hosts need to plan every detail of their event carefully, including how many gift bags to give out, and that’s why folks need to let the host know if they’re coming or not
Image credits: arinahabich / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The poster explained that she was having a big birthday party for her son, with a magician giving out personalized goodie bags, and that’s why she asked people to RSVP in advance
Image credits: zinkevych / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Unfortunately, on the day of the event, a mom who didn’t RSVP showed up with her son and tried guilting the host over her kid not getting a party bag
Image credits: Tara Winstead / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The mom even demanded vegan pizzas for her son and later sent the poster a message about how left out her kid was feeling after not getting a goodie bag
Image credits: JandamiHash
The poster wondered if she would be wrong to confront the entitled mom over her actions by letting her know that not RSVPing had probably ruined the experience for her son
The OP was quite shocked by the other mom’s behavior. Even though she had asked folks to respond to her party invites well in advance, this one parent ignored the RSVP request and just showed up on the day. The lady was also very demanding and expected her son to be given a personalized gift bag and vegan food.
To understand how to deal with such entitled people, Bored Panda reached out to Dr. Tzall. He is a NY licensed psychologist working as the Deputy Director for the Health and Wellness section of the NYPD. He also has a private practice and provides support for trauma, relationship issues, addiction, and mood disorders.
Dr. Tzall explained that “a sense of entitlement can stem from underlying psychological or social factors. Some individuals may have been raised in environments where their needs were consistently prioritized over others, fostering an expectation that the world would always cater to them.”
“Entitlement can also be influenced by societal privilege, where systemic advantages create an unconscious belief that one is inherently deserving of others' time, energy, or resources. Additionally, [it] can emerge as a coping mechanism for unmet emotional needs, with people unconsciously seeking to fill internal voids by demanding more from those around them,” he added.
The problem with the demanding mom’s behavior is that it puts a lot of stress and unnecessary pressure on the OP. She had spent nearly £12 each on personalized magic gift bags for the kids and it wasn’t possible to just whip out another one for the entitled lady’s child.
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
During the course of the party, the other mom demanded vegan pizza for her son. The OP wasn’t going to let the child suffer because of his mom’s behavior, so she ordered the food. Even this kind act wasn’t met with any gratitude. The selfish mom kept pushing for what she wanted even though the poster felt uncomfortable.
That’s why Dr. Tzall said that “setting boundaries with a demanding or entitled person requires clarity, consistency, and assertiveness. Start by clearly communicating what you are and are not willing to do, using ‘I’ statements to express your needs. It’s important to remain consistent, as entitled individuals may test your boundaries to see if you’ll give in.”
“Establish consequences for overstepping and follow through on them to reinforce your limits. Practicing self-care is also crucial, as it helps you maintain the emotional resilience needed to navigate these interactions. It’s important to recognize when the relationship is overly draining and to consider limiting or ending contact if the person refuses to respect your boundaries,” he explained.
The OP did want to confront the other mom, but she felt like even that wouldn’t help in any way. From all that went down, it seems like the other parent doesn’t have much empathy for people around her. She probably only sees her side of things and expects folks to cater to her needs.
This kind of behavior can really put people off and damage any kind of connections she has with others. Dr. Tzall said that “acknowledging a sense of entitlement is a significant first step toward personal growth. To work on this trait, self-reflection is essential. Building empathy is another critical step, which involves actively considering others’ feelings, perspectives, and limitations.”
It’s obvious that the entitled lady took things too far and made too many demands from the OP. There definitely needs to be some consequence for this kind of behavior, so what exactly do you think the poster should do about it?
Folks sided with the poster and urged her not to get too petty when confronting the other mom
