The quality of the relationship with your mother-in-law can develop independently of your marriage. She might not allow herself to get to know you personally at all, but instead focus on the idea that an outsider is taking away her child.
To better understand this dynamic, we went around the internet and collected a bunch of stories where MILs went completely off the rails. Whether they were offering unsolicited parenting advice or criticizing a spouse's character, these confessions show just how unpredictable and unfiltered a mother-in-law can be when emotions take over.
#1
Me, just shy of delivering 37 week twins, sitting in the recliner, minding my own business, reading my book, while my daughters are flipping around in my belly and shaking the bump.
My MIL, staring at this from the couch and being kind of creepy.
MIL: You must have hellions in there.
Me: Sorry, but that's the only way we make them in my family. I'm not sure why you're surprised.
I was taking no prisoners in third trimester. I regret nothing.
My MIL, staring at this from the couch and being kind of creepy.
MIL: You must have hellions in there.
Me: Sorry, but that's the only way we make them in my family. I'm not sure why you're surprised.
I was taking no prisoners in third trimester. I regret nothing.
68points
#2
I have 8 tattoos. MIL commented how tattoos are trashy. BIL (who is covered) says "don't you have a tramp stamp mom?"
She does.
She does.
68points
#3
My MIL said that she thought we were doing a great job, that our daughter was lucky to have wonderful parents, that she would follow our lead on parenting decisions, and that she would bring us food when she visits. That seems pretty wild from what I see other moms experience. My mother, on the other hand, is seconds from being out of the lives of all of her children, grand children and great grandchildren after this Christmas.
54points
#4
Lo tripped and grazed their knee. Lo was about 2. Lo came running to me for a cuddle. She stepped in between us and I said LO wanted me.
“Back off….Lo wants me.” As she turns her back to me. I was so shocked that anyone could say that to a mom I stood there a second with my mouth open wondering WTF is happening. This was the first time she showed her a**e with me. I’d never come accross anything like this and it took me a moment to process what she had said and what she was doing.
Lo makes eye contact with me over her shoulder and ramps it up. Lo let’s out a scream, claws at her face and grabs at her shoulder trying to climb over her shoulder to get to me. She tried to shush LO but because she’s only known LO for about 3-4 months (apparently that’s all the time she needed to build this kind of bond to go to her when they’re bleeding.) LO gives zero c**p about who she is… LO wants mom. LO ignores her and no one hears her over the screaming. Lo just Kicking and screaming Moooommmyyyyyyy and clawing the whole time.
MIL gets defeated and puts LO down in front of her, still semi blocking LO path to me. LO walks around her as I reach past her to scoop LO up and straight into my arms now 10x more upset then before over the knee.
Yeah b***h…. Got what you deserved putting your needs above my kids.
She never did do that again. But after it happened the first time I was prepared for the next time. I was so cross afterwards.
“Back off….Lo wants me.” As she turns her back to me. I was so shocked that anyone could say that to a mom I stood there a second with my mouth open wondering WTF is happening. This was the first time she showed her a**e with me. I’d never come accross anything like this and it took me a moment to process what she had said and what she was doing.
Lo makes eye contact with me over her shoulder and ramps it up. Lo let’s out a scream, claws at her face and grabs at her shoulder trying to climb over her shoulder to get to me. She tried to shush LO but because she’s only known LO for about 3-4 months (apparently that’s all the time she needed to build this kind of bond to go to her when they’re bleeding.) LO gives zero c**p about who she is… LO wants mom. LO ignores her and no one hears her over the screaming. Lo just Kicking and screaming Moooommmyyyyyyy and clawing the whole time.
MIL gets defeated and puts LO down in front of her, still semi blocking LO path to me. LO walks around her as I reach past her to scoop LO up and straight into my arms now 10x more upset then before over the knee.
Yeah b***h…. Got what you deserved putting your needs above my kids.
She never did do that again. But after it happened the first time I was prepared for the next time. I was so cross afterwards.
51points
#5
I was sick with bronchitis and a 101 fever while my husband's extended family was visiting and staying with us from out of state. While everyone was playing outside and I was lying on the couch, my MIL came in and gave me a stern lecture about "did I know what a problem I was causing by being sick? I was bringing everybody down!"
It was even more hurtful because my own dear mother had died a few months before. My son, who was five at the time, came inside at one point and told me he had had a dream that my mom was still alive and he was old enough to call her and she came and took care of me. He then brought me a glass of water, without being asked.
It was even more hurtful because my own dear mother had died a few months before. My son, who was five at the time, came inside at one point and told me he had had a dream that my mom was still alive and he was old enough to call her and she came and took care of me. He then brought me a glass of water, without being asked.
48points
#6
While short hair suited me, I shouldn't keep it short because obviously it is a male haircut and women look better with long hair and DH most likely is attracted to long hair. Then she tried to get validation from my husband (her son), DH shut her down so fast, saying I could go bald and still be the most beautiful woman and I didn't need nobody's permission to do anything with my body. She went mute and I finished with ,"thanks babe, a pixie cut is definitely on the horizon".
48points
#7
To my husband: "we're not arguing that she's not a good fit for you or isn't good to you, she's just not a good fit for our family."
The weekend before our wedding, she told me that she and my fiance had a "special relationship" and really it was like the three of us were getting married.
When my husband and I were first dating, we were abstinent (thanks Catholic/Christian upbringing), and she told the family she wished he would just have s*x with me so he would "lose his fascination."
Also once referred to me as a succubus 😂
I also have a sister who is four years younger than me and she told him in college he was dating "the wrong sister" (my younger sister was a high schooler at the time).
Haven't talked to that woman in several years.
The weekend before our wedding, she told me that she and my fiance had a "special relationship" and really it was like the three of us were getting married.
When my husband and I were first dating, we were abstinent (thanks Catholic/Christian upbringing), and she told the family she wished he would just have s*x with me so he would "lose his fascination."
Also once referred to me as a succubus 😂
I also have a sister who is four years younger than me and she told him in college he was dating "the wrong sister" (my younger sister was a high schooler at the time).
Haven't talked to that woman in several years.
47points
#8
"All that soy formula and hockey you exposed her too is gonna turn DD into a lesbian! I'll be expecting her over the summer and I'll break that willful streak and fix her."
Dd was 3, had a dairy allergy (and adores her soy milk) and loves hockey in TX. MIL lives in Arizona, DD has never and will never spend summers there. And as for willful? I let her have choices and opinions and she gets moderated votes in household things.
Dd was 3, had a dairy allergy (and adores her soy milk) and loves hockey in TX. MIL lives in Arizona, DD has never and will never spend summers there. And as for willful? I let her have choices and opinions and she gets moderated votes in household things.
45points
#9
She told me I looked exhausted. I told her I was and that I couldn’t sleep through the noises my daughter makes in her sleep (even as an infant she’d cry in her sleep, as an older baby and toddler shell laugh, talk, clap, scream, sing).
She told me its my own fault and that I should take sleeping pills… her son, my husband needs a shock bracelet to wake himself up because she ran power tools while he was an infant to condition him to noise. Thanks to her genius he still can’t wake up to noise as an adult. If I took a sleeping pill who would wake up if our daughter was awake and crying? I’d rather have 1000 days of broken sleep before I ignore my daughter’s needs 1x.
She told me its my own fault and that I should take sleeping pills… her son, my husband needs a shock bracelet to wake himself up because she ran power tools while he was an infant to condition him to noise. Thanks to her genius he still can’t wake up to noise as an adult. If I took a sleeping pill who would wake up if our daughter was awake and crying? I’d rather have 1000 days of broken sleep before I ignore my daughter’s needs 1x.
44points
#10
Ever since the pandemic began we've been pretty LC with Nome Queen. She gets one phone call a month.
On one of these calls she said something along the lines of "it's so good that LO's not willful yet."
Knowing what I do about DH's upbringing, she meant that we don't have to beat our child...yet.
A; we're not going to be using physical abuse to discipline our kid. B; Lady, you don't know my kid. She's just as hardheaded as her father is and that's the way I like her.
Never take parenting advice from someone who's own child needs 2 shots of tequila before they can call their parents.
On one of these calls she said something along the lines of "it's so good that LO's not willful yet."
Knowing what I do about DH's upbringing, she meant that we don't have to beat our child...yet.
A; we're not going to be using physical abuse to discipline our kid. B; Lady, you don't know my kid. She's just as hardheaded as her father is and that's the way I like her.
Never take parenting advice from someone who's own child needs 2 shots of tequila before they can call their parents.
42points
#11
I had a newborn (maybe 5 days old) and was struggling with producing milk. She said that the amount of milk you produce has to do with how much you feel like a mother, and that she could probably still produce milk. Her youngest was 30.
36points
#12
Mine once walked into the bathroom while I brushed my teeth and said "you know if you sign over guardianship of DS to me then I can get more money from social security" After I gagged on my tooth brush, I laughed, looked her dead in the eye, and said " that will never happen".
36points
#13
Just the good ol “sleep when the baby sleeps”
and “my husband didn’t help with the kids either it’s just how it goes” “think happy thoughts”
My sons dad didn’t give a flying s**t that I was up 20+ times with our son with severe reflux every single night alone. I was s******l and sobbing and he just said “that’s what mothers do” while he sat on the couch eating pizza and gaming with his friends. His sister said “if I worked all day I would wanna come home and game too” I was a stay at home mom so I was up with my son all night and then with him all day. Sons dad would come home from work, take a 3 hour nap and then wanna game when he woke up and then got to sleep all night.
His family was always on his side. This is why he’s an ex.
and “my husband didn’t help with the kids either it’s just how it goes” “think happy thoughts”
My sons dad didn’t give a flying s**t that I was up 20+ times with our son with severe reflux every single night alone. I was s******l and sobbing and he just said “that’s what mothers do” while he sat on the couch eating pizza and gaming with his friends. His sister said “if I worked all day I would wanna come home and game too” I was a stay at home mom so I was up with my son all night and then with him all day. Sons dad would come home from work, take a 3 hour nap and then wanna game when he woke up and then got to sleep all night.
His family was always on his side. This is why he’s an ex.
36points
#14
Cake Police has had some doozies. Here are the most memorable.
* Trying to tell us how to potty train our 3 year old. My husband interjects with, "You didn't even potty train me, your only child. You shipped me off to Grandma's for 2 weeks so she could do it for you."
* Helped us during an emergency and refused to do the bedtime routine I told her to do for the baby because she thought she was the baby whisperer. An hour of screaming later she finally calls me. I tell her to do the routine as I told her, baby asleep within 5 minutes.
* Told me that my chronic pancreatitis would probably get better if I went to church.
* Told us that our finances wouldn't be so tight if we didn't splurge on things like disposable diapers and expensive carseats.
* Suggested that I wouldn't need to take medication for my PTSD or depression if I just got outside...or came to church.
* Told us she had more experience raising children because she's older. My husband is an only child. She is the youngest in her family and she didn't live near her siblings so she did not help with neices or nephews. I on the other hand am the oldest of 4 siblings, one of which was 13 years younger. I also babysat for years. Oh yeah, and I have 3 children and another one on the way.
* This was over this past weekend. "Didn't Jake from State Farm start out white? So he's just a black guy now? They really need to push inclusion and diversity and just change a person's ethnicity that badly?" Calm down Karen, it's a f*****g commercial.
* Trying to tell us how to potty train our 3 year old. My husband interjects with, "You didn't even potty train me, your only child. You shipped me off to Grandma's for 2 weeks so she could do it for you."
* Helped us during an emergency and refused to do the bedtime routine I told her to do for the baby because she thought she was the baby whisperer. An hour of screaming later she finally calls me. I tell her to do the routine as I told her, baby asleep within 5 minutes.
* Told me that my chronic pancreatitis would probably get better if I went to church.
* Told us that our finances wouldn't be so tight if we didn't splurge on things like disposable diapers and expensive carseats.
* Suggested that I wouldn't need to take medication for my PTSD or depression if I just got outside...or came to church.
* Told us she had more experience raising children because she's older. My husband is an only child. She is the youngest in her family and she didn't live near her siblings so she did not help with neices or nephews. I on the other hand am the oldest of 4 siblings, one of which was 13 years younger. I also babysat for years. Oh yeah, and I have 3 children and another one on the way.
* This was over this past weekend. "Didn't Jake from State Farm start out white? So he's just a black guy now? They really need to push inclusion and diversity and just change a person's ethnicity that badly?" Calm down Karen, it's a f*****g commercial.
35points
#15
I had our second baby a week ago. My MIL was over yesterday to meet him and asked when I was going to change his diaper because she wanted to see his body. I told her that was a weird request and wasn’t going to be happening.
35points
#16
Prior to my daughter being born, I made the statement that my daughter was going to be raised to be very independent. I stated that I didn’t want her to be impressed by some punk with money telling her she’s beautiful. My MIL said “you don’t want to do that, make her too independent. Then no man will want her” and I stated back how that wasn’t true because I obviously caught her son’s eye lol.
35points
#17
She tried to take my kid out of preschool without my permission and then she shoved me around after I confronted her about it at my other kids school pickup. Fun times! Oh wait, she also illegally shut our cell phones off the first day of the pandemic and she threatened to make my family homeless because she wanted money she gifted us for our home back and said it was a loan and she was legally entitled to that money and if we didn’t give it back she’d sue us and she would own our home. You know those “precious grandkids” she claimed to love? They’d be homeless because of her. I think I’ve deserved the last year of silence after we moved away and ghosted his whole family.
34points
#18
My exMIL called daily from her island to tell my then husband that my hyperemisis was because I really didn’t want my baby and he should leave me and take the baby when it was born because I was abusing it.
Yes, I threw up 10 times a day for 8 months and lost 45 pounds because I didn’t want the baby we’d been planning for 2 years.🙄.
Yes, I threw up 10 times a day for 8 months and lost 45 pounds because I didn’t want the baby we’d been planning for 2 years.🙄.
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33points
#19
Oh man I have so many haha
One day my MIL showed up unannounced and I had just put my baby down. I answered the door obviously surprised bc I wasn’t expecting her and told her I just put my son down for a nap but come in and hang out in the living room. I wasn’t ready so I went to change in my room and when I came out she had woken my son up, she smirked at me and brought him into the living room. I was so mad and just waiting for my husband to come home bc I didn’t even know what to say so I just continued getting ready and making breakfast. As soon as my husband came home she exploded saying what a rude b***h I am, she’s entitled to her grandsons time and my sleep schedule (for my infant) was to ridged and babies are suppose to be spontaneous. As she was leaving she said ‘now I know what your mother doesn’t love you.’ There’s a reason we are no contact, she’s so unstable I never know how to interact with her.
One day my MIL showed up unannounced and I had just put my baby down. I answered the door obviously surprised bc I wasn’t expecting her and told her I just put my son down for a nap but come in and hang out in the living room. I wasn’t ready so I went to change in my room and when I came out she had woken my son up, she smirked at me and brought him into the living room. I was so mad and just waiting for my husband to come home bc I didn’t even know what to say so I just continued getting ready and making breakfast. As soon as my husband came home she exploded saying what a rude b***h I am, she’s entitled to her grandsons time and my sleep schedule (for my infant) was to ridged and babies are suppose to be spontaneous. As she was leaving she said ‘now I know what your mother doesn’t love you.’ There’s a reason we are no contact, she’s so unstable I never know how to interact with her.
32points
#20
Various comments about how my kid doesn't like a specific healthy food that he clearly liked. For example, I made kiddo a really healthy cake with really healthy frosting for his first birthday, because he isn't going to know the difference. She went on about how he didn't like it...it was about six inches across and he ate half of it. Gee, I wonder why her son has food issues?
Complained about not getting enough time with the baby especially alone. In the same conversation, complained that they felt like we got everything and they got nothing out of the relationship, and cited babysitting for us for an hour while my husband worked and I went to a friend's shower. So apparently you want time alone with the baby, but not if we are doing something else?
When baby was little, complained that my mom got to babysit when she didn't. We had told them when I was pregnant (almost a year earlier at this point) that anyone babysitting needed to know infant CPR and first aid. (No certification required.) They are retired and have money, and I sent them a list of local and online resources at their request to do this. They have since lost those babysitting privileges, so I guess they didn't need to learn it after all.
Complains about not seeing us enough. Never initiates plans with us.
Complained about grandson liking other people better than her when he was a toddler. Said it was because they got more time and we were stopping her from developing a relationship...except one of them lived hours away and had only met my son a few times. My son avoided her, because she tried to grab him when he didn't want it and control his play. She had been advised multiple times that he didn't like it and the behavior would make him not want to be around her, but didn't think that was true.
Basically she digs her own hole, blames someone else for it, and then is all hurt that no one fills it in for her.
Complained about not getting enough time with the baby especially alone. In the same conversation, complained that they felt like we got everything and they got nothing out of the relationship, and cited babysitting for us for an hour while my husband worked and I went to a friend's shower. So apparently you want time alone with the baby, but not if we are doing something else?
When baby was little, complained that my mom got to babysit when she didn't. We had told them when I was pregnant (almost a year earlier at this point) that anyone babysitting needed to know infant CPR and first aid. (No certification required.) They are retired and have money, and I sent them a list of local and online resources at their request to do this. They have since lost those babysitting privileges, so I guess they didn't need to learn it after all.
Complains about not seeing us enough. Never initiates plans with us.
Complained about grandson liking other people better than her when he was a toddler. Said it was because they got more time and we were stopping her from developing a relationship...except one of them lived hours away and had only met my son a few times. My son avoided her, because she tried to grab him when he didn't want it and control his play. She had been advised multiple times that he didn't like it and the behavior would make him not want to be around her, but didn't think that was true.
Basically she digs her own hole, blames someone else for it, and then is all hurt that no one fills it in for her.
30points