Giving a sincere apology is rarely easy. After all, the time for something like that most often comes after strongly emotional moments, and admitting that you were wrong is not what any of us crave doing.
And yet, it’s these moments when we choose to swallow our pride and tell the people we care about ‘I’m sorry’ that have such a huge impact on our relationships. For example, this one dad recently melted netizens’ hearts when an apology note he had written to his daughter after a fight was posted online by his now-grown-up girl, 15 years later. Scroll down to learn all about it!
More info: TikTok
Apologizing is rarely easy, but the importance of doing so sincerely cannot be overstated
Image credits: teannsydney / TikTok
A girl got into a pretty heated fight with her dad over her poor performance during a tennis match, and things were very sour when they returned home
Roughly 15 years ago, Teann Sydney Williams lost an important tennis match due to a struggle with her serving technique. The final result sparked a pretty heated and emotional fight between her and her dad, Peter.
“I remember saying this so vividly. I was so upset, and obviously, I didn’t mean it, but I got so mad I blamed it on my dad,” Teann remembered during her interview with People. “I was like, ‘This is all your fault. I hate you. This is why I lost.’”
Image credits: teannsydney / TikTok
Soon, they both realized that they had done some things wrong, but her dad decided to take the first step and slide the most wholesome apology note under his daughter's door
Although they both soon realized that such a silly conflict wasn’t worth ruining their relationship over, someone had to take the first step. It was then that Teann’s dad decided to write the most wholesome apology note and slide it under his daughter’s door.
The note turned out to be a huge success, and needless to say, soon, all the apologies were made, and all the conflicts ceased. But for Teann, who was always her dad’s girl, this note was more than just an apology, which is why she made sure to keep it safe all these years.
Image credits: teannsydney / TikTok
The woman decided to share the note with the world 15 years later, as her dad's Parkinson's disease made expressing her feelings even more important
Now, when—a decade and a half later—a new “That Sums Up Who My Dad Is” TikTok trend appeared, the woman decided that it was a perfect way to share this story about her amazing dad with the rest of the world online. However, all of this wasn’t just to gloat.
Peter, who was diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease when Teann was just 5, has continued to live his life almost unhindered by his condition for the longest time. However, in recent years, the situation began to change much more dramatically, which made sharing this story and expressing her love all the more important for his daughter.
Image credits: teann_ramirez / Instagram
She was very happy about the positive responses online but was also saddened that many people didn't get to experience such a relationship with their parents
Teann felt both happy and saddened by the comments she received on her TikTok. On the one hand, there were a lot of very beautiful things that people said, which most definitely brought an even bigger smile to her face.
However, at the same time, there were plenty of people saying how they never had anything like this. “I wish everyone could experience what I have. I’m super blessed with the parents I have. I grew up in a really great home, and I’m forever thankful for that. It makes me sad that others don’t have the same,” concluded the woman.
Image credits: Teann Williams / Facebook
Apologizing is important, and a lot of the time, that is true even if you don’t really feel you're in the wrong. According to an article on the Elevate Counseling website, there are several reasons for this.
First, saying ‘sorry’ increases a person’s self-awareness, which often helps understand that even if they feel like they were right, they did hurt the other person’s feelings, whether in their approach, the things they said, or anything else related to that fight. Without self-awareness, changing your patterns is very challenging.
Image credits: teann_ramirez / Instagram
Next, apologizing demonstrates humility and acknowledges personal responsibility. None of us are perfect, and we can’t avoid making mistakes. However, what makes a difference is the ability to own up to your actions instead of blaming them on anything and anyone but yourself.
And lastly, it’s the best way to start repairing connections. It’s rare to find conflicts where one side would be absolutely right and the other completely wrong. While the blame is not necessarily equal parts, we all have our shortcomings, and it’s only when we open ourselves to discussion that we can start working on them and repair relationships.
Image credits: teann_ramirez / Instagram
However, the key to all this is to make your apology genuine. Otherwise, it’s unlikely to be effective in any way. Since it can be hard even when you truly mean it, here are some tips that might help, as per Julie Corliss of Harvard Health Publishing.
Begin by acknowledging what you did and taking responsibility for it. No matter what kind of harm it was, this step confirms that you agree it was unacceptable while validating the other’s feelings. However, when doing this, you must avoid being vague, evasive, or using wording that minimizes the offense.
Image credits: teann_ramirez / Instagram
Follow it up by explaining what you think happened. Do this in the best way you can without turning it into an excuse. Use the phrase ‘there is no excuse’ if needed.
Then, the next logical course of action, if you understand your error, is to express guilt and regret. Let the other person know you don’t feel good about what you did.
And, in conclusion, offer to make amends. If the damage was physical, offer to repair, replace, or fix whatever was damaged. If the offense hurt the other person’s feelings, show a willingness to change and improve.
Image credits: teann_ramirez / Instagram
But ultimately, it all comes down to meeting others halfway. The end result can hardly be good if only one side is willing to apologize and attempt to correct things.
Of course, whether we like it or not, someone always has to be first, and if both parties remain too stubborn, a simple fight can end up ruining the prettiest relationship. So why not be the bigger person and take that leap of faith? Writing that little apology note will be worth it.
What did you think about this story? Do you find it easy to apologize? Share it all in the comments below!
The commenters called the woman's dad a role model and could hardly stop crying because of how beautiful his note was
