How far should you go for family? You’re obviously expected to help them out more than you would, say, your friends, but are you obligated to be at their beck and call for the rest of your life? There’s got to be some sort of limit to the relationship, surely.
One woman turned to Reddit to vent about her 28-year-old sister who expects her to clean her filthy house on her days off. Now the sister, who identifies as disabled, has got pregnant, and the woman’s worried about what this new responsibility will mean for her.
More info: Reddit
You’re expected to go further for family than you would for friends, but this woman’s sister asks a bit too much of her
Image credits: cottonbro studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The sister is on disability benefits, but doesn’t have any official diagnosis, and has never worked a day in her life
Image credits: MART PRODUCTION / Pexels (not the actual photo)
She lives in a one-bedroom apartment with two cats and a dog and expects her sister to clean it on her days off
Image credits: MART PRODUCTION / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Now she’s revealed that she’s pregnant and wants to keep it, but her sister is concerned about the baby being raised in a filthy house by a mostly single parent
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Worried about the extra responsibility this might mean for her on top of everything else she already does for her sister, the woman turned to netizens for advice
OP begins her story by telling the community that her 28-year-old sister has classified herself as disabled and gets disability benefits but doesn’t have any official diagnosis that qualifies her as disabled. She adds that her sister is a high school dropout who hasn’t worked a day in her life and struggles with normal day-to-day tasks because she’s always “too tired.”
She goes on to say that her sister is “hysterical” about her health and has had every medical test done on her every few months but that the doctors haven’t picked up any problems. According to OP, her sister lives in a one-bedroom apartment with her two cats and a dog who make an awful mess that OP has to clean up on her days off.
OP tells the readers that although her sister has a fiancé, he’s the only one who works and doesn’t have time to clean the house because of his heavy workload. OP also shares that the couple are thousands in debt and have to borrow money from her every month just to cover their food and bills.
To make matters worse, OP says that her sister has now revealed to her that she’s pregnant and wants to keep the baby.
She concludes her post by wondering about the added stress and responsibility this will mean for her, especially considering she’s spending most of her days off helping her sister already.
From what OP tells us in her post, it would seem that her sister feels somewhat entitled to her ongoing care, and cash, too.
If you’ve ever dealt with an entitled family member, you’ll know firsthand how unreasonable they can be. So, what makes a person think the world owes them something? And what’s the best way to deal with them if they’re family? We went looking for answers.
Image credits:Ron Lach / Pexels (not the actual photo)
According to the WebMD website, an ‘entitlement mentality’ is best defined as a sense of deservingness when little to nothing has been done to deserve special treatment. In short, it’s an attitude of, “You owe me.”
While it’s not known exactly how this mentality develops, entitlement is a narcissistic personality trait that could arise from the environment the person grew up in, the way the person’s parents treated them, and whether adults solved their problems for them.
In her article for VeryWellMind, Arlin Cuncic writes that it can be difficult to deal with people who come across as entitled and selfish. Relationships with them can create constant stress, as well as grind down your own sense of self-worth.
Cuncic suggests three ways that may help you cope with an entitled person. These include establishing firm boundaries with consequences, setting limits on what they can expect from you and being willing to deny their requests, and encouraging them to problem-solve for themselves.
OP would probably do well to put some of the above into practice before the baby arrives, or she might find herself becoming a full-time babysitter on top of her cleaning duties and constant bailouts.
What would you do if you found yourself in OP’s shoes? Do you think she should put her foot down and stop enabling her sister’s slovenly lifestyle? Let us know your opinion in the comments!
In the comments, readers agreed that the woman has got to stop enabling her sister by cleaning up after her and helping her out with her bills, or the situation will only get worse
