Bride's Nasty Message Goes Public, She Doesn't Understand Why She's The Bad Guy

We’ve all probably heard about how sticks and stones may break bones, but words could never hurt people. But that’s not entirely true, is it? Some words can be hurtful, especially when said about the people we love.

For this redditor, one mean word is all it took to end a long-standing friendship. It was something that her friend—a bride-to-be—said about her daughter, which became a turning point in the relationship and left the bride without not only a friend but a flower girl, too.

There’s no denying that friendships are one of the cornerstones of a happy life. In addition to providing support, companionship, and a sense of belonging, friendships also keep us healthier, and needless to say, all of the above make life significantly better. According to the American Psychological Association (APA), people with friends tend to be more satisfied with their lives and less likely to experience depression, as well as heart problems and chronic diseases.

However, in order to feel the backing of true friendship, it’s crucial to choose friends wisely and to be able to end certain relationships if they are not based on mutual respect and understanding. The latter is what the redditor felt like she had to do after a longtime friend called her six-year-old daughter a cow – clearly not something a true friend should do.

Talking about personality traits we look for in a friend, psychotherapist and author Kaytee Gillis, LCSW-BACS, seconded the idea that respect plays a significant role when it comes to friendships. In a piece for Psychology Today, she noted that while specific traits we look for might differ from person to person, some qualities people seek in a friend are rather universal, and one of them is a minimum level of kindness and understanding. While that might sound like a low bar, not everyone can be equally kind, which is important to take into consideration.

“Some people are naturally programmed to respond in a compassionate way, while for others, this approach is not always easy. We all exist on different areas of the empathy spectrum, but look for, at least, a minimum understanding of basic kindness and understanding. Treating others with respect should be the bare minimum,” Gillis wrote.

Unfortunately, the OP’s friend didn’t exactly treat her with kindness and respect. After the redditor realized her mistake of not having fitted the flower girl’s dress earlier, she got in touch with the bride with options on how she could fix the situation. But instead of being given an answer, she had to listen to the friend bully her six-year-old child. As a parent should, the woman was not willing to listen to someone bad-mouthing her kid, nor was she looking forward to attending the wedding anymore. Fellow Reddit users sided with the mom, assuring in the comments that she wasn’t a jerk for skipping the wedding, nor for letting other friends know the exact reason why.