Unwanted pregnancies, unfortunately, happen, and some people choose not to go through with the birth. However, those who do typically end up in a messy situation.
This couple is no different. The woman has been vocal about her reluctance to be a mother, while her ex-husband also refuses to be involved full-time. She one day showed up at his workplace to drop off her son and demand 50/50 custody, further complicating their problem.
After getting berated by her husband’s family, she now wonders if she was wrong for what she did.
Many unwanted pregnancies don’t end well for everyone involved
Image credits: Kristina Paukshtite / Pexels (not the actual photo)
This woman ended up divorcing her husband, the person who pushed her to continue raising the child despite her reluctance
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
She demanded 50/50 custody from her now-former spouse
Image credits: semenay erdoğan / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
To push her case, she made an unannounced visit to the man’s workplace and dropped off their infant son
Image credits: Vegetable_Ring_2588
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
An unintended pregnancy may take a toll on the woman’s mental health
The woman’s actions and persistence to have her husband involved may indicate that she is under a lot of stress. Research has shown that this is a common occurrence among women going through unintended pregnancies.
According to a study published in BMC Pregnancy and Childbirth, unwanted pregnancies increase the risk of maternal depression and parental stress by 22%. Marital conflict was also a high likelihood, and as seen in the story, the couple's relationship ended in divorce.
Another study by the University of the Basque Country in Spain concluded that unexpected pregnancies can disrupt the woman’s way of life.
“Our interpretation is that unexpected pregnancies can be more destabilising for younger women because their emotional and employment situation tends to be more precarious,” the study’s author Anna Barbuscia explains.
The emotions that women go through as they deal with unwanted pregnancies can be overwhelming. This is why one of the first steps most experts advise is to acknowledge the shock.
According to PsychCentral, it is a normal emotion to feel, especially after going through sudden traumatic life changes. Therefore, giving yourself time to process and take it all in may be necessary.
However, the bigger problem for the woman appears to be her ex-husband, who seems more concerned with controlling the situation than providing help. He left her with no workable options, including adoption.
In her case, professional help may be the next best option. As a primary care physician, Dr. David Moss points out that lawyers are best qualified to help a person navigate legal battles, especially in the author’s case, where the husband has made the situation more complicated.
“Legal counsel is a valuable resource for determining whether the patient has an obligation to inform the father or if any legal action may be needed to protect the patient's wishes,” Dr. Moss wrote in an article for American Family Physician.
The author is on the right track in contacting a lawyer. However, it may be best for her to try to get full custody of the child and not let the father be involved.
The woman provided more information in the comments
Many took her side, faulting the ex-husband for “forcing” her to have the child
A few people criticized her
And there were those who pinned the blame on the couple
