"Have No Intention Of Becoming Vegan": Woman Taken Aback After Date Calls Her Out

To eat or not to eat meat when you’re in the company of a vegan—that is the question.

It’s one this Redditor has been mulling over after a third date with a guy she described as “funny, brilliant, and intelligent” didn’t quite go as planned. During the meal, he casually mentioned he was vegan, which she took in stride. But when it came time to order, the woman didn’t think twice about getting a burger.

Days later, though, the man sent her a text calling her choice “disrespectful.” Now, she’s wondering whether she may have been out of line.

People adopt veganism for a variety of reasons—be it health, ethics, environmental concerns, or simply all of the above. For some, these values are so important that they prefer their partners to share their lifestyle. However, with most of the world still consuming animal products, many vegans choose not to narrow their dating pool and are open to mixed-diet relationships.

In fact, research from Myvegan shows that vegans are nearly four times more likely than meat eaters to have gone on a date with someone who follows a different diet (33.9% vs. 13.6%). They’re also almost three times as likely to have been in a relationship with someone whose diet doesn’t align with theirs (38.7% vs. 10.3%).

But does that make ordering something as bold as a burger in front of a vegan appropriate, especially when you’re just getting to know each other? Bored Panda asked Scottish vegan influencer Sophia, known as @vegansoph on Instagram and TikTok, to weigh in.

Sophia, who has a non-vegan partner, doesn’t believe eating meat around vegans is inherently bad manners. “I guess it’s similar to one friend ordering a low-calorie salad because they’re on a weight-loss diet, and the other ordering a cheeseburger and fries,” she says. “It might seem a bit senseless, but I don’t think it’s rude.”

Being vegan for five years hasn’t stopped Sophia from comfortably dining with meat eaters. “Unless I want to spend the duration of the meal talking about veganism, I won’t bring it up,” she notes.

“That said, in the context of the first few dates, where you’re trying to put your best foot forward, it would have been a thoughtful gesture to order something vegan as a sign of respect,” she adds. “However, if the man expected both people to eat vegan, he should have made that clear from the start to avoid any awkwardness.”