Since I was about 25, my grandma had been pestering me with questions at every opportunity - when would I have kids? Yes, today I am a dad of 3, and the old lady has lived to see great-grandchildren - but it was my own choice, not hers. Who among your relatives does this in your extended family?
For example, the author of our tale today, the user u/InvestigatorHour2911, also has such a person in her circle. This is her auntie, who has been annoying her with questions about kids and motherhood since her teen years, and one day got what she deserved in the presence of many people... But let's not get ahead of ourselves here.
More info: Reddit
The author of the post has medical conditions which make her infertile, and she decided to stay child-free
Image credits: Liza Summer / Pexels (not the actual photo)
However, the woman's aunt has been pestering her with baby questions since her early teen years
Image credits: InvestigatorHour2911
Image credits: MART PRODUCTION / Pexels (not the actual photo)
No explanations could stop that lady, so our heroine went very low contact with her over time
Image credits: InvestigatorHour2911
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
But recently, at the woman's engagement dinner, the aunt was present - and she started asking her typical questions in front of everyone
Image credits: InvestigatorHour2911
The author saw red - and called out the aunt so harshly she ended up leaving the dinner early
So, the Original Poster (OP) says that since early youth, she has had health issues that would make having children impossible, and literally since the age of 16 she has always told her relatives that she has decided to stay child-free. Not only because of her medical conditions, but also by her own conscious choice.
However, as many of us know very well, relatives often don't care about our choice... And in our heroine's case, it was her aunt, who, despite the niece's regular explanations, constantly pestered her with questions about when she would finally become a mother. No answers, even the most reasonable, actually satisfied her.
A couple of months ago, the author got engaged, and recently the future spouses arranged a joint dinner for their relatives so that folks from both families could get to know each other better. Our heroine's aunt was also present - and she couldn't miss the opportunity to ask the niece her 'signature' question. At the same time, she publicly declared that the OP was child-free and infertile...
The original poster lost it and pounced on her aunt with loud reproaches, recalling that this is not the first year that she has been faced with her annoying questions - and not the first time she had explained to her what was what. The aunt was shocked by such a reaction and soon left, and the OP, even seeing that those around her appeared to side with her, is now not sure how appropriately she acted in this particular situation.
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
"Unfortunately, almost every one of us can remember the experience of communicating with such people - and in fact, they are not so much interested in our answer, as in the very fact of interference in someone else's personal life," says Irina Matveeva, a psychologist and certified NLP specialist, whom Bored Panda asked for a comment on this case. "Simply because violating someone else's personal boundaries is a special pleasure for them."
"In the described situation, the aunt simply wanted to quickly attract additional attention to herself, to bring the general line of conversation to a topic that interested her specifically. And, paradoxically, the harsh reaction she received is in fact almost the most effective answer."
"The thing is that for such people, a shy reaction to their behavior often feels like a true reward, an encouragement to further actions and speeches of this kind. And vice versa - a sharp backlash can, if not stop her, then at least make her refrain from provocations for the near future," Irina summarizes.
People in the comments also noted that the aunt's behavior was completely rude and out of line, so the author's reaction was, in their opinion, completely justified. In addition, commenters advised the woman to try to have less contact with her abusive auntie and, if possible, refuse to communicate with her at all. And do you, our dear readers, also agree with this view of the situation?
Most commenters just backed the author, urging her to go no-contact with her aunt - and that's that
