The popularity of the I'm The Main Character subreddit is a testament to how people detest those who publicly act like they're at the center of the world. The community also has one condition for its posts: they have to feature "deliberate attention-seeking behavior, entitlement, or individuals thinking they are more privileged than anyone else."
The subreddit is also against discrimination, harassment, racism, misogyny, bigotry, or personal attacks. Even if the main characters featured on the subreddit are extremely rude, the rules ask members not to harass them on their social media. The same goes for discussions among members: "There is always a real human with emotions behind the screen," the group cites Reddiquette.
To learn more about 'Main Character Syndrome' from a psychology professional's perspective, we reached out to Dr. Alex Danvers. Because the term gets thrown around online quite frequently, we were curious to know whether psychologists and mental health experts characterize it as a medical diagnosis.
"'Main Character Syndrome' isn't a medical diagnosis," Danvers tells us. "It's a pop culture term, which means it has a looser definition, and people can use it in different ways. Typically, I see it used to mean that someone sees their life as a story—a TV drama or a romantic comedy—and puts themselves in the starring role."
Dr. Danvers says that such a mindset can change the way a person thinks. Sometimes in big ways, sometimes in small ways. "At the problematic end, it can make the person too focused on themselves, always trying to shift conversations and social situations to center around the drama of their personal story."
"This can cause someone to overlook other people’s thoughts or feelings, treating them as supporting characters. That can feel, to friends, like a lack of empathy or rudeness."
"But it can also lead to behaviors that are pretty common and less problematic," Danvers continues. "Like trying to present yourself as positively as possible or focusing on documenting your life on social media over engaging in the moment."
Danvers also notes that people engaging in narcissistic and entitled behavior might be masking other feelings, like feeling insecure or like they're not in control. "If someone is giving big main character energy, there's probably something deeper going on, and there are likely aspects of their life they aren't happy with," the social psychologist explains.
In recent years, there has been much discussion about how people do not know how to act in public spaces anymore. Concertgoers keep throwing things at celebrities during concerts, and kids are destroying testers and being mean to Sephora employees. Did we forget how to act when we're not at home?
"The pandemic made a lot of people feel more anxious and less connected," Alex Danvers says. Since unhappiness and anxiety in daily life can lead to narcissistic behavior, he agrees that the pandemic and social media play a role in how we conduct ourselves in public spaces.
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"Depending on the way you use social media, it can be very anxiety-provoking," Danvers observes. "People do a lot of self-comparison there and can find themselves wanting. Becoming the main character of the story of your life is a way of using fantasy to cope with a harsh world."
"Right now, the world feels very uncertain and potentially dangerous to a lot of people," Dr. Danvers invites us to sympathize with the main characters. "There are wars, political instability, concerns about disease, and concerns about harms from climate change. These are real things that produce real anxiety, and in daily life, it often feels like we as individuals can't take action to meaningfully improve things."
Danvers says that people's self-absorbed behavior can become a way to deal with those problems. "That's when fantasy can come in as a protective measure—you might want to imagine that you're the hero in a scripted story because things always work out for them. What becomes important is the drama and learning the life lesson that the 'episode' was meant to teach."
That said, Dr. Danvers cautions against losing yourself in that kind of fantasy. "Of course, life doesn't come in episodes with conflicts that neatly resolve themselves, and this worldview can mess up people's real relationships with their real friends and family."
