Trying to imagine a future with someone who really wants children but you don’t or vice versa is impossible. Now with more people opting for only having pets, this discussion is also becoming more important. Pet owners are becoming more emotionally dependent on their animals and they would rather keep them instead of a person who dislikes them.
This man was lucky to find a woman who didn’t mind his cats and eventually married her, but recently she started complaining about them and asking to get rid of them. The husband wanted to see for himself what was causing his wife stress and found out that she made up everything, which led to such a big fight that divorce is very likely.
More info: Reddit
Man was suspicious about his wife actually not getting sleep because of his cats and decided to investigate
Image credits: Jennifer C. (not the actual photo)
The Original Poster (OP) has had his cats since before he met his wife and the woman knew how important they were to him. She didn’t have a problem with them until recently, when she started complaining about how noisy they are at night and losing sleep over them. So she suggested her husband should get rid of them or she will leave him.
The man never heard anything and his wife told him that he is a heavier sleeper. He believed her until one time when she complained about waking up to let the cats in at 1 am because he was also awake at that time. The man decided to purposefully not sleep all night and listen to the noises.
In the morning, the woman told him that she woke up at least 7 times and the cats kept jumping on her. This is not what the OP saw as the cats were in the other room, the bedroom door was closed and the cats kept pretty quiet.
The author of the post met his wife when he already had cats and the woman never had an issue with them until recently
Image credits: UhOhSleepyThrowaway
This is when the OP confronted his wife and called out her lies. At first she didn’t say anything and left. When the wife came back, she continued ignoring her husband but finally started to talk and threw back the accusations of lying because he made himself appear to be sleeping when he wasn’t. She also blamed him for being obsessive.
The original question was posed at this point and the OP wondered if he was actually an obsessive jerk for faking sleeping to check if his wife was lying. However, the story went downhill from here as the man provided several updates.
She started to complain about them waking her up every night several times a night and proposed an ultimatum: it's either her or the cats
Image credits: UhOhSleepyThrowaway
The first update was posted in the comments after the OP kicked his wife out of his home. She wouldn't talk to him about what happened and kicked his cat when he started scratching the door, wanting to come into the bedroom where she was sitting.
The second update is in the first post written after the wife was Baker Acted. “The Baker Act is a Florida law that enables families and loved ones to provide emergency mental health services and temporary detention for people who are impaired because of their mental illness, and who are unable to determine their needs for treatment,” according to University of Florida Health.
He got a call from the hospital inviting him for family therapy. During the session, he found out that the woman lied to him about the cats being noisy because she was mad at them for ruining a story she was writing on her laptop by stepping on it. She knew that the OP wouldn’t get rid of them for that, so she started lying about not getting enough sleep.
The man actually considered it, but then his wife told him that she had to get up to open the door again in the middle of the night, and this time he had been awake
Image credits: excelAnt (not the actual photo)
Image credits: UhOhSleepyThrowaway
The session ended with the wife screaming about how the OP is scum for choosing an animal over her, which is not a great way to end a therapy appointment. But screaming was the least of OP’s worries.
At some point, the wife was released from the hospital and wanted to pick up her things from their apartment. The OP warned her that her key wouldn’t fit as he changed the locks, so she would have to wait a bit until he came back.
He didn't see her stand up nor hear his cats asking to be let in, so he decided to purposefully stay up all night and see what his cats did
Image credits: UhOhSleepyThrowaway
It seems that the wife didn’t wait for anything and broke the bedroom window with a brick, somehow managed to get in through the broken window, which was on the second floor, and not only took her stuff but destroyed the cats’ litter box and the cat tree, as told in the second update.
Thankfully, the man listened to people saying that he needed to move the cats to a safe place when he first told his story, because who knows what she would have done to them. This is when the man made up his mind about divorcing his wife.
The cats were pretty silent, but in the morning, his wife complained about not getting sleep again, so he realized she had lied to him to make him get rid of his pets
Image credits: UhOhSleepyThrowaway
After this, the OP moved to another place and needed to find a new job because the wife “kept causing trouble for the company and they gave [him] the option to either quit on [his] own terms or be fired.”
At the time of writing the third update, the OP already had a new job that the wife didn’t know about and was actually doing better, trying to recover and feeling safer. He even met a new woman, but was wary about starting a new relationship.
The third update included information about his wife as well. Turns out, she came to his family home to tell them that she would be suing the OP and fighting for the custody of the cats unless they gave her his new address. The family didn’t betray the OP and the people in the man’s life who thought the OP was exaggerating apologized to him for not being on his side.
Later he found out the reason, which was that she was angry at one of the cats for stepping on her laptop because it ruined a fanfiction she was writing
Image credits: UhOhSleepyThrowaway
A couple of months passed and the OP shared the aftermath. He started from his cats, who he saw were traumatized, as they weren’t as playful as before and the youngest started peeing all around the house, so the vet, knowing the story, attributed that to the stress it went through.
It is not clear at what point the divorce happened, but in this post, the OP already calls the woman his ex-wife and as far as he knows, she’s not doing well. Her family was abusive to her and other family members are dead, so she didn’t really have anywhere to go and is now living in the streets or couch-surfing. She also got into drugs and it didn’t help her mental health.
As for the man himself, he is now in a new relationship, but the experience has made him pretty paranoid and he has trust issues. He didn’t even believe his new girlfriend when she told him that one of their cats peed on the carpet, but he is hopeful to overcome his issues by going to therapy.
Eventually the man decided to divorce his wife and had to move and change his job because of how she was behaving
Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio (not the actual photo)
Image credits: UhOhSleepyThrowaway
Nobody came out victorious after this split and even the cats are struggling, but people in the comments encouraged the OP and congratulated him for leaving a manipulative abuser. They were proud that he is dating again and that he is taking care of himself and his cats.
The OP went through quite a wild experience he never would have predicted as he had known his wife for years and they were happily married up until the argument about cats. Do you think there was more to it than just a ruined fanfiction? Some people suspected that such a sudden personality change might indicate health problems. Also, how do you think the OP handled the situation? Let us know your thoughts in the comments.
People in the comments were pretty horrified and suspected that the sudden change in personality isn't just a regular mood swing
