When somebody in your family is a monster who has taken advantage of you, you obviously don’t want to be anywhere near them. But when your other, normal relatives insist that they want to see you over the holidays and invite you over, you actually expect them to be present.
One woman, a trauma victim, opened up to the AITA online community about her disastrous Thanksgiving family dinner. She shared how her relatives left her and some of the guests alone for hours, and then tried to blame her for finally having had enough and walking out. Scroll down for the full story and to see how the internet reacted.
Warning: this story covers traumatic experiences and may trigger you.
A trauma victim turned to the internet for help after sharing how Thanksgiving dinner with her family turned into a nightmare situation
Image credits: Magic by Jelena (not the actual image)
She opened up about what made her want to leave, and how her relatives reacted poorly to her setting basic boundaries
Image credits: Karolina Grabowska (not the actual image)
Image credits: LightFieldStudios (not the actual image)
Later, the woman shared a lot more context about her traumatic past
Image credits: vershinin89 (not the actual image)
Image credits: missstrugglebus
Victims of trauma can sometimes experience PTSD symptoms. Different therapies can help them process what happened
There is absolutely no excuse for how the woman’s family treated her. The biggest problem is that they didn’t believe her when she told them that her uncle had taken advantage of her while she was intoxicated.
On top of that, years later, they disrespected her by leaving her and some of the other guests alone for hours. All the while, they were visiting their other relatives.
And then, they had the audacity to blame the victim for finally gathering up the courage to walk out of the disastrous dinner. The entire situation is deeply unfair and infuriating to read.
As Verywell Mind explains, trauma can affect your ability to cope and function. It can lead to physical, psychological, and emotional harm.
Some victims of traumatic events may develop post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) or PTSD-like symptoms.
Some symptoms of PTSD include re-experiencing the traumatic event, avoiding reminders of the trauma, being easily startled, and having negative thoughts and beliefs.
You may also feel hypervigilant and unsafe. In the United States alone, around 6.8% of adults experience PTSD.
Processing the trauma can take a very long time, but it’s possible with the help of therapy, medication, or both.
Some treatments include cognitive-behavioral therapy, exposure therapy, acceptance and commitment therapy, and eye movement desensitization and reprocessing.
Image credits: Nappy (not the actual image)
Having a strong social network that supports you after a traumatic event can be invaluable
Treatments aside, you also need to find the right, healthy coping strategies after traumatic events so that you don’t, for example, begin misusing substances.
To be clear, you don’t have to force yourself to talk to anyone else about how you feel. That being said, you have to try to accept your feelings for what they are, without judging them or pushing them away.
Verywell Mind stresses that you have to give yourself time to deal with what you’re feeling. You can’t expect your feelings to go away in the span of a single day.
However, if you can, try to find a support group where you can openly talk about your traumatic experiences with others who have been in your shoes.
In the meantime, spend time with family and friends who support you and whom you can rely on. “Even though you might feel like being alone, isolating yourself can make it more difficult to deal with the effects of trauma.”
It’s also vital that you take care of your body. That means trying to get enough rest, eating nutritious food, and getting regular exercise.
What are your thoughts? How would you have handled the disastrous family dinner if you were in the author’s shoes? If you feel like sharing your thoughts, you can do so in the comments below.
Image credits: Kateryna Hliznitsova (not the actual image)
Here's what the internet had to say after reading through the stressful story
