A woman has inspired a conversation about unconventional families after revealing that she and her partner live in separate suites of the same house with their respective children.
Shelley Hunt, 38, and her two kids share a home with her partner, Peter Verge, and his three children. But while you could say they live together, you could also make a case that they're not. Shelley and her sprouts are staying in one suite, while Peter and his are in the other.
Earlier this month, Shelley shared her family's living arrangement on TikTok, and it quickly went viral, gaining over 5 million views. In the video, the woman explains the reasoning behind moving into a home with two suites, and how the whole "blended-unblended" situation is working out for them.
More info: TikTok
Meet Shelley Hunt, a mom-of-two who shares a home with her partner and his three kids
Image credits: shellhuntful
Recently, Shelley released a TikTok to explain their unconventional living arrangement
Image credits: shellhuntful
Image credits: shellhuntful
Shelley explained to BuzzFeed that she and Peter came into this arrangement while they were newly dating and both were planning to buy a home. "I had been through a house fire and a divorce and many subsequent moves/transitions, and I was hoping to settle with my kids long-term," she said.
"We were very new in our relationship, so living together with five kids didn't seem wise, for us or them."
Image credits: shellhuntful
In one of her TikToks, Shelley said that two-suite homes are much more common in Canada, where she and Peter live.
"When I found this place, I couldn't believe how ideal it was for two families. We could be close by but have our own family units. We looked at the house once and put in an offer. It resulted in us both spending less money on a home than if we’d bought separately."
Image credits: www.tiktok.com
Image credits: shellhuntful
The video has been viewed over 5 million times
Both suites have their own kitchen and living room. Shelley's has two bedrooms and one bathroom, while Peter's has three bedrooms and two bathrooms. The only shared spaces are the hallway and laundry room.
Each suite also has its own separate entrance. Shelley said that she and Peter are completely separate when spending time with their kids, unless they plan something together like a game night or dinner.
Shelley's entrance
Image credits: shellhuntful
Peter's entrance
Image credits: shellhuntful
Shelley's bedroom
Image credits: shellhuntful
Peter's bedroom
Image credits: shellhuntful
Shelley's kitchen
Image credits: shellhuntful
Peter's kitchen
Image credits: shellhuntful
Shelley's bathroom
Image credits: shellhuntful
Peter's bathroom
Image credits: shellhuntful
As for splitting duties and costs, Shelley said, "That's the best part of this type of setup: We know exactly what we’re responsible for, and we handle our own shit. We are responsible for our children and suites. I make sure my kids are ready, fed breakfast, off to school, to their extracurricular activities, to all appointments, fed dinner, and ensure they have everything they need in life. Peter is the same. We clean our own spaces. We arrange childcare for our own children. Sometimes we ask each other for help, but it’s always exactly that: an ask."
The couple have separate finances. "Peter’s suite is bigger than mine, so that’s how we’ve determined the percentage of the bills we each pay. I pay 42% of the mortgage and utilities and taxes. He pays 58%. It’s what we agreed was fair," she explained.
Here's a more in-depth tour of their house
Shelley has no doubt that living blended-unblended has strengthened her and Peter's relationship, as well as each of their relationships with their kids. "[Peter and I] started with a strong relationship, and this has definitely maintained the respect, love, consideration, and romance. Our communication is amazing, because again, there's not a lot of room for unsaid expectation and disappointment!"
"I am amazed at the bond I have with [Peter's kids] and how the kids have all embraced us. They use 'step-sibling' and 'step-parent' language, and call us a family," Shelley added. "This was something they initiated and never something we pushed on them. I love their ability to embrace something that is untraditional and thrive in it. They don’t know how things are 'supposed' to be, but they do recognize happiness and health and love when they feel it."
And a video on the couple's future plans
The woman thinks that the overwhelmingly positive response to her TikToks shows that people are becoming more and more open to unconventional family structures, and that's a good thing.
"Can you imagine, for a moment, what message Mother’s Day celebrations in school send to a child in foster care? For a child who lost their mother to cancer? For a child who was raised by their grandparents? Can we stop sending the message to children that they aren't whole because their family doesn't look a certain way?"
"Our ideas of family have been so exclusive. Who are we if our families are untraditional? Less? Hell no. Everyone deserves a seat at the table. I absolutely love Mother’s Day, but let’s widen that door! Every kind of family counts and is worth celebrating," she said.
People think Shelley and Peter's way of living makes a lot of sense
