Everybody has secrets, and even the people closest to us might have a side we're not familiar with.
This post may include affiliate links.
So when Reddit user Dixonnail inherited her late father's storage unit, she wasn't in a hurry to open it — there was a real chance that whatever was inside could flip her opinion of him upside down.
Eventually, curiosity got the best of her, and she found the courage to take a peek. Just as she expected, the contents did surprise her. Only in a much more pleasant way than she imagined.
Sometimes, after people pass away, they leave behind more than just possessions
Image credits: Hankwang / Wikipedia (not the actual photo)
Inside her late father's secret storage unit, this woman found a lifetime of memories
Image credits: Abbie Parks / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Suzy Hazelwood / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Image credits: dixonnail
Image credits: The Yuri Arcurs Collection / freepik (not the actual photo)
We need our parents' affection right from the get-go
"Children rely on their caregivers for everything," writes Darius Cikanavicius, a certified mental health coach with over a decade of experience and author of Human Development and Trauma: How Childhood Shapes Us into Who We Are as Adults.
"They need mirroring, attunement, and validation from their caregiver, in addition to having their physical needs met, in order to flourish in adulthood. If a child's caregivers are emotionally healthy and resolved, they will develop a strong sense of self."
"They will feel healthy, unconditional love radiating from the people closest to them. They will know what love looks and feels like. They will pursue this feeling throughout their lives. Indeed, they will be able to comfort themselves, love themselves, and develop strong, healthy relationships with the people around them because they have a healthy template to fall back on," Cikanavicius explains.
However, if the parents aren't healthy emotionally, the kids will develop a weakened and unstable sense of self.
"They will be unable to comfort themselves, trust others, love themselves, and will face many difficulties finding fulfillment, meaning, and contentment in their adult relationships. They will not know what healthy love looks and feels like."
Therefore, the sting we feel in our chest when our mom and dad don't show us enough love is very real.
Maintaining a relationship with emotionally distant parents can be really hard
Image credits: Anna Keibalo / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
Some experience a disconnection from their parents in childhood, and the relationship improves once they reach adulthood. Others are relatively close during their childhood, and the relationship disintegrates as they mature, while others have difficulty in the relationship throughout their lives.
"As a result, some individuals [might] decide to [entirely] cut off their relationship with their parents," says Michelle P. Maidenberg, Ph.D., MPH, LCSW-R, CGP, who maintains a private practice and is an adjunct graduate professor at New York University. "In some instances, communities and people outside of the family become a surrogate family for them."
"Others choose to maintain a relationship with strict boundaries in place. Still others continually engage in the relationship and tend to find themselves in a recurrent pattern of hopefulness and disappointment because of neglecting to get their emotional needs met."
Different scenarios lead to different outcomes, but according to Maidenberg, what she finds the most distressing is the perpetual thoughts of "not being good enough," and constantly second-guessing whether or not to engage and re-engage in the relationship.
Whatever the case may have been for our Redditor, at least it's clear that her father loved her with all his heart, and luckily, she found that out later rather than never.
People have had a lot of reactions to the woman's story
Some also shared their own similar experiences
