A simple truth in life is that you can choose your friends, but you can’t choose your colleagues. And hey, even if you get lucky with your coworkers, you might not be so fortunate when it comes to your manager, and that alone can ruin your whole work environment.
I can probably think of a few managers in my life who made it hard to get up and go to work, and you probably can too — it's almost an adulthood rite of passage. But at least you can take some comfort in knowing that your boss isn’t like the one in today’s story. Why, you ask? Because at least you haven’t been told to stop using a medical device that’s keeping you alive.
Read more: Reddit
A good manager can really make a workplace feel a lot less draining, but it also means that a bad manager will make it unbearable
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
A woman with a feeding tube had her device alarm go off, and quickly scurried into a room to take care of it
Image credits: reshetnikov_art / Magnific (not the actual photo)
Despite being told that the device wasn't a problem, her manager noticed the beeping and decided it wasn't appropriate
Image credits: Rosi_ana
The manager suddenly decided the beeping sound was too "disruptive," and asked the woman to avoid using the feeding tube at the office
Image credits: user6699736 / Magnific (not the actual photo)
The woman naturally thought the request was inappropriate, and went to HR, who seemed to share her sentiment
Image credits: Rosi_ana
The e-mails, however, did not stop, and the manager kept doubling down on the device being, allegedly, disruptive
Image credits: Rosi_ana
Image credits: katemangostar / Magnific (not the actual photo)
Despite getting reassurance from HR that she wasn't doing anything wrong, the manager's attitude kept escalating, and the woman felt vulnerable
Image credits: Rosi_ana
She had to consider whether she should flag the situation more severely with HR, exposing how intrusive her manager was
Workplace clashes and arguments between colleagues are everywhere. We spend most of our time at work, after all, so it’s bound to happen, but not to the point where your life is at risk, like in today’s story. The Original Poster (OP) is a 21-year-old woman who has to use a feeding tube for at least 20 hours a day. That leaves her with only a four-hour window when she can go without it.
When she was hired, she told HR, backed by a doctor’s note, that she used a feeding tube. They said it wouldn’t be a problem, as long as she stepped into a private area to refill it. It was a perfectly reasonable accommodation, and that’s how things went… until one day ,she forgot to change the bag and it started beeping. According to her, she immediately stepped away to deal with it.
But that wasn’t the end of it. A new manager was actually incredibly bothered and sent her an email saying the beeping was too disruptive for her coworkers. Because of that, he asked her to avoid wearing the medical device in the office. Unsurprisingly, after a back-and-forth over email, she went to HR, who was very supportive.
Thinking that would settle it, she was surprised when the manager started acting strangely and kept asking questions about the tube. She didn’t mind at first, but it escalated when he emailed her again, saying she shouldn’t use the device in ways that affected others, even though it wasn’t affecting anyone. Since the issue didn’t seem to be going away, she started wondering if she should go back to HR.
Image credits: wavebreakmedia_micro / Magnific (not the actual photo)
The manager was clearly misinformed, or at the very least, not informed at all, about the risks of not using a feeding tube. As the OP explains, she needs to use the device for 20 hours a day, and for good reason. According to medical professionals, feeding tubes are used when someone can’t safely eat enough by mouth, and consistent use is critical to avoid malnutrition or serious complications.
By asking her not to use it, or even suggesting she should handle everything before her shift, the manager may actually be crossing a legal line. Per the ADA (Americans with Disabilities Act), denying a necessary accommodation can count as disability discrimination. There are some exceptions, like if the accommodation enforces a burden for the company, but that clearly wouldn’t apply in this situation.
So, what can she do? Most likely, she’ll need to go back to HR and try to fix the issue once and for all. Especially since studies show that employees with health conditions are often victims of ableism, especially when their needs are visible or misunderstood. This can lead to isolation and the person feeling judged, which can quickly turn into a bigger social problem in the workplace.
To no one’s surprise, netizens were quick to tell the OP to take all of the manager’s emails straight to HR. With clear evidence in hand, HR would likely have to step in more seriously, especially since it showed direct pushback against a medical accommodation. So, if you were in her shoes, what would you do if your manager approached you like this? Do you think she should stay quiet? Let us know.
Netizens believe the woman should immediately go to HR with all of the e-mails exchanged
