Every relationship has its ups and downs, which is often what helps strengthen the bond between both partners. It only starts becoming a problem when one person’s moods dictate the entire relationship, and the other individual has to constantly keep adjusting.
This is what one woman faced after moving in with her fiancé, only to be treated like the babysitter, breadwinner, and maid. Unfortunately, since the man sometimes behaved kindly and other times rudely, she often felt at a loss whether to stay with him or end things.
More info: Reddit
When one partner keeps controlling what the other person says, does, or even where they go, it is often a red flag in a relationship
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The poster explained that she moved in with her fiancé because he insisted on being closer to her and that he didn’t like it when she visited her home
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The man also went hunting every Sunday and would keep his fiancée in the dark about his whereabouts, which would often leave her upset and worried
Image credits: lookstudio / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Since his daughter was due to visit soon, the man expected the poster to babysit his kid while he went hunting, and got mad when she refused
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The poster also explained that she had to manage the home, her work, and take care of her partner’s kid, while also dealing with his mood swings
Since the woman had moved in with her fiancé, he made sure that she didn’t go home too much and told her that he would miss her a lot if she went away. Even when she suggested going to visit her friends and family, the man got angry and asked her if she thought she could just leave whenever she wanted.
According to therapists, when your partner tries to keep you from your loved ones, it’s often a sign that they are trying to control and isolate you. This is a potential warning sign of a toxic relationship where one person might be trying to take all the power and wants to dictate what the other individual should or shouldn’t do.
The OP also mentioned that since her partner used to go hunting for hours every Sunday, he expected her to just wait for him to return and not leave the house. Since his daughter was visiting him for the weekend, he told the poster to babysit her, even though the little girl wasn’t told a single thing about their relationship.
When a person keeps their partner a secret from their children, it’s often a sign that they might not be taking the connection seriously. If they don’t make an introduction within the first few months, it might be due to fear of how the kids and their significant other will bond, but after a while, it’s important that they do what's needful.
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Apart from the troubles in her relationship, the woman had also been under a lot of stress because she had to manage her work, look after the household, and also take care of her fiancé’s son. It didn’t seem like her partner was helping her with any of the tasks on her plate, and that made her feel undervalued and exhausted.
What also concerned the woman was how often the man’s moods changed because he could go from being loving and romantic to extremely rude and distant very quickly. This made her extremely confused because she didn’t know how to handle his changing emotions and what could set him off.
Experts state that this kind of moody behavior can stem from a person’s own problems and insecurity, but if it happens too often, it might be a form of manipulation. If someone is always becoming distant when they don’t get their way, they might be doing this to make their loved one feel guilty so that they comply.
Despite all these issues, the woman felt like she couldn’t possibly leave her partner, and she explained that doing so would be frowned upon in her culture. Since she had been married before and it didn’t work out, leaving her fiancé now could ruin her family’s reputation, which she didn’t want.
What advice do you have for the OP, who’s dealing with such a tough situation? Do share your thoughts in the comments below.
People urged the woman to get out of the toxic relationship and go back to her family as soon as possible
