Dad Shares His Heartache Of When His Son Told Him Another Kid Kept Calling Him 'Chinese Boy'

Parenting is hard as it is. But when life hits your kid earlier than you expected with what many consider global problems, it gets even harder to manage it all.

Former White House National Security Official, Diplomat, and Congressman from New Jersey Andy Kim shared a story of how his kid experienced his first instance of racism. Sad to say, it was against him, and while he didn’t really identify it as racism—he’s still a kid—now Andy is wondering how this talk of what really happened should go down.

More Info: Twitter

At the end of March, Andy Kim went to Twitter with a heart-wrenching thread explaining how his 5-year-old son came back home and asked why this one bigger kid kept calling him “Chinese boy.” He kept saying back that he’s actually a New Jersey boy, not fully understanding what the bigger boy truly meant.

The son laughed it off, but Andy knew the true meaning and multitude of this issue—this was the kid’s first experience of racism, pointing out how Andy’s family still can’t shake off the “shadow of foreignness.”

Andy continued with a question: what does Andy tell his son, as a parent, regarding this issue? How does one approach the problem of racism? What should the “talk” look like, if it should be a talk at all?

His parents never gave him the talk, but Andy called his mom and asked what she would have done. After explaining what racism is, she’d have said this:

“You are very special. Keep being yourself. You are never alone. Whatever problems come, let us know and we will go through together.”

The two agreed that he’d need to talk to the boys about the racism they might face in their lives, and reinforce the idea that racism is not cool, that the family is against discrimination, so that they’d be aware.

Andy took the opportunity to preach that every one of us needs to know the struggle of others and that we ought to stand for all. Sure, different ethnic groups experience racism differently, but it’s ultimately a battle for all, not just one group.

A lot of questions can be drawn from this thread: how do you deal with your kids experiencing racism, when do you start talking to your kids about it, and how much of an impact would it have if these talks were given beyond just families of color, by people who don’t experience racism against them, so as to not foster racist behavior?

Whatever the case, the ultimate message is that racism shouldn’t be a thing at all. Not in the US. Not in the world.

The thread engaged a lot of people, garnering nearly 140,000 likes with almost 20,000 retweets. Some shared their own stories, while others empathized with the family, expressing their sorrow that this even happened and showing support for them.

You can read through the entire post and everyone’s reactions on Twitter, but before you go, let us know what you thought about all of this in the comment section below!