Having family by your side during tough times is important, but there are some wounds that only friends can heal. Some people, though, have no shame, as the only reason they have friends is to take advantage of them and mooch them dry.
That’s exactly what this guy is doing to his friend, who bent over backwards to help him. Not only did she give him a place to stay, but she also helped him bag a job. Despite all this, he ended up calling her a jerk, and she realized that she had had enough! Here’s what really happened…
More info: Reddit
Some people are so dependent on other people, they spend their whole lives mooching off others
Image credits: Stockbusters / Freepik (not the actual photo)
When the poster's friend (Josh) had some trouble with his uni housing, she gave him a place to stay, but it was tough, so she had to kick him out
Image credits: Necessary_Mine_762
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
She even helped him get a job at her company, but Josh just refused to pull his own weight and kept complaining about everything
Image credits: Necessary_Mine_762
Image credits: Grinvalds / Freepik (not the actual photo)
As his manager, she called him out for being late, but he called her a jerk, and she finally had enough of his mooching behavior
Despite bending over backwards for him for ages, he's now avoiding her, and even requested a new manager at their company
In today’s story, the original poster (OP) tells us that she has known her friend (Josh) for the past 8 years, but now she’s sick of his behavior. A few years back, when he was going through a housing crisis, she generously offered him a place to stay. Little did she know that he would be the worst roommate ever, as he barely helped out and depended on her for everything.
Well, she soon realized that it was just too cumbersome for her, and she asked him to move out. However, that did not mean that she stopped helping him. He wouldn’t quit whining about money, so she got him a job in her company with a 40% hike compared to his previous salary. Despite all this spoonfeeding that he received, Josh just refused to change.
Since he kept complaining about the numerous things that he was still struggling with, their friends supported him as much as they could. However, one day, OP realized that she couldn’t keep doing this when he refused to step up and take responsibility for himself. He even came in late at work, so she called him out as his manager, but he called her a jerk for trying to “sabotage” him.
It’s unbelievable that after everything she has done, this is how he repaid her! She snapped back and said that his life would improve if he didn’t rely on strategic incompetence. Ever since, he has been avoiding her and even requested a new manager. Now, OP feels that she ruined things by mixing her personal life with her professional one.
She also added that she suspects Josh has undiagnosed ADHD or depression, so she tried to get him into therapy. Of course, lazy Josh always bailed!
Image credits: pressfoto / Freepik (not the actual photo)
To get better insights into the matter, Bored Panda reached out to Eden Lobo, a counselor and psychology professor. She explained that helping a friend is a great thing, but sometimes it can cross the line into enabling, and that’s when it gets tricky. When you keep enabling a friend, even if you mean well, it can actually do more harm than good.
“They stop figuring out how to handle life on their own, like cooking, budgeting, showing up on time, or managing adult responsibilities. And if they’re dealing with ADHD or depression, enabling can actually get in the way of real progress. Instead of learning coping skills or getting proper help, they’re just getting temporary fixes from a friend, which doesn’t solve the root of the problem,” she added.
Many people claimed that the poster should cut ties with him, so we asked our expert whether such a friendship can survive. She claimed that it might, but only if Josh is willing to reflect, take accountability, and grow. However, Prof. Lobo believes that sometimes, distance is the healthiest option.
“Sometimes, stepping back is actually an act of care, for yourself and for the other person. Continuing a one-sided friendship can quietly build resentment, and that can do more long-term damage. If Josh ever shows genuine change and wants to reconnect in a more balanced way, the poster will know. And if not, it’s still okay to move forward with peace, knowing she truly tried,” Prof. Lobo concluded.
Well, I hope that OP realizes this too, and does what is necessary for her own well-being as well. What about you? What would you do in her shoes? Let us know in the comments!
Folks found Josh's entitled behavior highly problematic, and claimed that the poster should have stopped enabling him long ago
