You get a call, you’re promised a chill evening with food and laughs, only to find out you’re actually the designated babysitter for the night. For a long time, people have found this to be the scam known as "the babysit-and-switch".
This happened twenty-five years ago, but today's Original Poster (OP) still couldn't believe the sheer audacity of her classmate inviting her over for a night of pizza, just to realize she had been looking for a free babysitter.
More info: Reddit
Even after twenty-five years, some things are still etched in our memories
Image credits: Bizon / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The author and her husband had been invited by a wealthier friend for a casual pizza night after a long time apart
Image credits: Judgypossum
Image credits: Stockbusters / Freepik (not the actual photo)
During the call, the friend casually revealed they would be going to a party and the couple was expected to babysit her child
Image credits: Judgypossum
Image credits: beststudio / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The author was confused and declined, realizing they were never truly invited to hang out, just used for free childcare
Image credits: Judgypossum
The friend became upset and accused them of ruining her plans, seemingly unaware of how inappropriate her request was
Back in their graduate school days, the OP and her husband lived on a low budget. However, one of her classmates was engaged to a wealthy guy. Naturally, their social circles didn’t align as the couple often suggested outings that were way out of financial reach for the OP and her husband.
Still, the classmate constantly framed the distance as them avoiding her, no matter how often she was reminded it was about money, not malice. One Saturday, same classmate called the OP, asking her to come over with her husband, hang out, and maybe order pizza.
When the OP accepted the invitation, the classmate then mentioned that they could go ahead to see a movie after putting her son in bed. This confused her, and by the time she asked to clarify what it meant, the classmate told her that she and her fiancé had plans to attend a nearby party and they needed someone to stay behind and watch their three-year-old son.
The OP politely declined the impromptu nanny gig, and the classmate was shocked. When she told the classmate that she didn't want to be a free babysitter, she was met with claims that the pizza was supposedly meant to be the payment. The classmate couldn’t believe her generous offer of pizza didn’t seal the deal, and it only took seconds for the OP to realize the true nature of the invitation.
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Entitlement in friendship is very common and shows up even in the most subtle ways. VeryWell Mind explains that it often shows up as expecting others to prioritize their needs, give time or resources, or offer support without reciprocation. They explain that these relationships are often one-sided, and that friends on the receiving end may feel taken for granted or emotionally drained.
We Thrive Together emphasizes that a characteristic of healthy friendships is clear boundaries and mutual consent. These boundaries help define what’s acceptable in the relationship, and consent involves actively seeking and respecting a friend’s agreement before making decisions that impact them.
When boundaries or consent are ignored, friendships can quickly become one-sided or even manipulative, often leaving one party feeling as though they can't say "no". However, Psychologist Deborah Byrne explains that always saying yes due to guilt, or fear of coming across as selfish or unkind is dangerous in relationships.
In fact, she urges that people should never be afraid to reject or turn down invitations if it makes them uncomfortable.
Netizens expressed disbelief and frustration over the classmate's blatant entitlement and lack of respect. They sympathized with the OP, pointing out how unacceptable it is to disguise babysitting as a casual hangout.
What would you have done if you were in the OP's shoes? Would you have stayed to babysit or said no like the OP? We would love to know your thoughts!
Netizens were also amazed at the friend's audacity and applauded the author for declining the invitation
