One of the best ways to show that you truly care about your significant other is to make them a homecooked meal. Not only is it practical (who doesn’t love good food?), but it also shows that you’re willing to put in the time and energy to do something nice for them. The sad part? Some folks just don’t appreciate the gesture… nor do they respect your boundaries. Instead, they get toxic.
Redditor u/Dizzy-Suggestion2360 spilled his heart out to the AmIOverreacting online community after his relationship went sour. He cooked a fabulous dish of wine-braised short ribs for his girlfriend, only for her to throw it all away all because she wanted pizza instead. Read on for the full story, including the fallout and the advice the internet gave the chef. Bored Panda has reached out to the author for comment, and we’ll update the article as soon as we hear back from him.
Cooking a dish for your partner at home is a wonderful way to show them how much you appreciate them. But alas, not everyone's a fan...
Image credits: Anna Tolipova / Freepik (not the actual photo)
One distraught man revealed how his girlfriend literally trashed his homecooked ribs because she preferred to eat pizza instead
Image credits: Dizzy-Suggestion2360
Image credits: Dizzy-Suggestion2360
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
It might be difficult to spot toxic behavior in a relationship, but there are lots of overt and subtle signs
Look, we’re not going to beat around the bush. Reading about someone throwing away a delicious homecooked meal (ribs, no less) hurts physically and emotionally. We all want to be seen, heard, understood, accepted, and respected by other people. Your efforts, literally getting trashed, are a very personal rejection.
This sort of behavior crosses so many lines and is so disrespectful that it’s hard to consider how you can come back from this. A simple apology won’t do. And if this is a pattern of red-flag behavior, it makes sense that the author finally had enough and decided to move on from the relationship.
However, it can sting that you’ve poured so much time and energy into a relationship that ends up turning truly toxic.
There are lots of red-flag behaviors that indicate that you might be stuck in a toxic relationship. According to Healthline, some of these signs include the fact that your partner:
- Doesn’t support you
- Only cares about what they want, ignoring your needs and interests
- Communicates in a hostile, sarcastic way
- Constantly feels envy and jealousy, and won’t celebrate your successes
- Exhibits controlling behavior
- Resents you and holds on to grudges
- Is dishonest
- Disrespects your time
- Has poor personal finance habits
- Constantly stresses you out, exhausting you physically and mentally
- Cuts you off from your family and friends
- Makes you neglect your health, hobbies, and self-care
- Forces you to feel like you’re constantly walking on eggshells around them, avoiding healthy conflicts or tackling serious problems
Image credits: Priscilla Du Preez / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
You have to be willing to fight for your well-being. Think about how your partner makes you feel. If you're constantly unhappy and drained, it's a serious problem
Meanwhile, Verywell Mind adds that a toxic relationship is one where you’re constantly devalued and depleted. Essentially, you’re putting much more into the relationship than you’re getting out of it.
What’s more, toxic partners disrespect you, blame you, undermine your self-esteem, make you feel constantly depressed, angry, or tired, and generally bring out the worst in you. On top of that, it’s a big red flag if you spend a considerable chunk of your time and emotional energy trying to cheer your partner up.
In these situations, it’s much healthier to be single than to stay with a person who wrecks your health, confidence, and other relationships.
If you’re persistently unhappy, you need to take charge of your love life and make serious changes.
Image credits: Alex Green / Pexels (not the actual photo)
After you've gotten out of a bad situation, be willing to forgive yourself and move past blaming your ex. Focus on yourself and healing
Relationships Australia NSW suggests that you get in touch with your family and friends so that they can hear you out without judging you. “Some may have been trying to tell you that you’re not being treated well, and it’s worth listening to their perspective.”
What’s more, you have to be really honest with yourself about whether you’ve already done everything that you could to salvage the relationship. Compare how confident and happy you were before the relationship to how you feel now. And start cultivating healthy boundaries in all aspects of your life.
“Don’t be too hard on yourself. It is understandable to hold on to hope about how good things used to be, or to be afraid of being alone, or to fear no one else will love you. Take it one step at a time. Focus on yourself. By continuing to blame your partner, you are giving them all the power and robbing yourself of the energy you need to move forward.”
How would you react if your partner threw away the dinner you spent ages making? How would you have handled the sensitive situation? Have you ever dated someone who kept ignoring basic boundaries? What are some major relationship red flags that you’re wary of? Let us know in the comments below.
The internet was shocked that anyone would behave this way. Here's what they told the distraught boyfriend
As the story started going massively viral online, the author shared a very important update
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
He confronted his girlfriend about where their relationship is at and decided to call it quits
Image credits: user17316117 / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Dizzy-Suggestion2360
Many people were impressed by how the man handled the tense situation. Here are their thoughts, pieces of advice, and similar experiences
