Many would agree that losing a pet carries the same pain and grief as losing a loved one. It’s why some people hold onto the remains of their late pets, whether ashes in an urn or smaller keepsakes like jewelry.
However, this man failed to understand the importance of keeping these tangible memories when he refused to let his girlfriend bring her late dog’s ashes on their vacation.
He apologized after a huge argument, but the woman nonetheless broke things off with him. Scroll down for the entire story.
Some people may experience prolonged grief after losing a pet
Image credits: 1footage / envato (not the actual photo)
A man didn’t understand his girlfriend’s mourning of a late dog and refused to let her bring her pet’s ashes on their vacation
Image credits: Emily / emazon.com (not the actual photo)
He later apologized and admitted to his mistake, but she still decided to break things off with him
Image credits: Overall_Tomato_6664
Pet grief may feel worse than human loss
Image credits: Helena Lopes / unsplash (not the actual photo)
It was unfair for the author to criticize his girlfriend for “mourning this dog for too long,” which he eventually realized. Pet loss counselor Beth Bigler describes this as “disenfranchised grief,” wherein it isn’t openly acknowledged like how people grieve when a loved one passes on.
In her interview with USA Today, she says it’s why losing a pet is “worse than human loss” for some people.
“No one's bringing over a casserole when it's an animal. You don't get bereavement days off work for that,” Bigler explained, adding that divorces and miscarriages fall under the same category.
According to Bigler, many of her clients go through periods of shock, disbelief, and even brain fog after losing a pet. Others experience it through physical manifestations like heart palpitations and stomach pain.
Bigler adds that many pet owners particularly mourn losing a companion that shows them unconditional love.
“[It] is something many guardians haven't always received in their lives,” she added.
However, some people don’t develop the same attachment for their pets. According to licensed mental health counselor Lisa Hutchison, LMHC, these owners may see their animal companions as a mere “trophy” or “property.”
It may be the reason why some of them could act dismissive towards someone in deep grief, which has no timeline, according to Los Angeles-based therapist Nadja Geipert.
“It’s going to take as long as it’s going to take,” Geipert told Psych Central, emphasizing that it is not a linear process.
The author realized he was wrong, which was a step in the right direction. Unfortunately, he made things worse by showing his partner the Reddit comments he made, which was the final nail in the coffin that pushed the woman to break up.
She may (or may not) agree to reconcile, but for the time being, he will have to deal with the consequences of his actions.
Most commenters agreed he was being a jerk
Some shared similar experiences
There were also those who sided with the author
