Bouquet tossing at weddings is a long-standing tradition that honors couples’ single friends and wishes them luck in finding love. Even if the person who caught the florals doesn’t meet the partner of their dreams and fails to walk down the aisle next, it’s a great way to have some light relief with beloved women during the celebration.
However, redditor iWorkWithPlanes decided to interfere with such fun by slapping the flowers to the ground before his girlfriend could catch them. Unfortunately, his attempt at a joke didn’t sit well with the crowd and even got him kicked out of the wedding.
Scroll down to find the full story and a conversation with event planner Aviva Samuels from Kiss The Planner and head designer and founder of April & Fritz, Bree Michaelas, who kindly agreed to tell us more about this tradition.
Bouquet tossing is a perfect way to celebrate single friends and wish them luck in finding love
Image credits: Omelnickiy / envato (not the actual photo)
However, this guy completely ruined it by slapping the flowers out of his girlfriend's hands
Image credits: YuriArcursPeopleimages / envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: iWorkWithPlanes
The origins date back to ancient Rome, where brides would carry or wear flowers as a symbol of new beginnings, fertility, and loyalty
Image credits: Tamilles Esposito / pexels (not the actual photo)
It’s truly fascinating how the bouquet-tossing tradition started. The origins date back to ancient Rome, where brides would carry or wear flowers as a symbol of new beginnings, fertility, and loyalty. The florals were often a combination of herbs, like dill and rosemary, which were believed to fend off evil spirits and ensure a harmonious marriage.
By the Middle Ages, the custom had evolved and the bouquets became more elaborate, with fragrant herbs, flowers, and spices. They would also be scented with rosewater to mask the unpleasant smells that were common in crowded churches.
The more modern version of the bouquet tossing tradition emerged in the 14th century, when it was considered good luck to touch the bride on her wedding day. Single women would crowd around her, hoping that the good fortune would rub off on them and they would soon marry. Some of them would go too far, trying to take pieces of her dress as keepsakes.
To fend them off, the bride would toss the flowers and run. “The bouquet toss tradition was created, in part, to bestow luck on guests without going to such extreme measures,” says wedding planning and design expert Eddie Zaratsian.
While such behavior might seem over-the-top today, back in the day, marriage was the only way out of poverty for women and was more of an economic transaction than a romantic one. Nowadays, the tradition has become a fun way to include single friends in the celebration and incorporate healthy competition into the wedding.
Interfering with a bouquet toss can be seen as disrespectful or in poor taste
Image credits: Leah Newhouse / pexels (not the actual photo)
However, event planner Aviva Samuels from Kiss The Planner tells Bored Panda that disrupting a bouquet toss can be seen as disrespectful or in poor taste. "Because it is a traditional moment, interfering with that tradition could upset some attendees, especially those who were excited about catching it. After all, the tradition of catching the bouquet at a wedding is rooted in the belief that whoever catches it will be the next to marry.
He, she, or they who catch the bouquet are thought to be blessed with luck and good fortune and will soon be walking down the aisle as well. Though the tradition is largely symbolic and fun, some people still view it with a sense of anticipation and perpetuate the superstition, and disappointment and hurt feelings might happen as a result."
Head designer and founder of April & Fritz, Bree Michaelas, also strongly advises against interrupting such a tradition. "While humor can lighten the mood at a wedding, it’s important to remember that if the couple has included a bouquet toss in their celebration, it likely holds some significance for them.
Weddings are deeply personal events, and the traditions chosen reflect the couple's values and wishes. Disrupting this moment could be seen as disrespectful to their intentions and might upset some guests who take the tradition seriously. Prioritizing the couple’s wishes is key to ensuring the day is as special and meaningful as they envisioned," she explained.
Besides intervening with this tradition on purpose, there are also other ways that this moment can go wrong. "The bouquet could hit someone in the face, or eyes, and scratch delicate skin or poke an eye. To combat this potential problem, make sure the bouquet is designed for throwing. A lighter, more compact version can be created by your florist, or an inexpensive artificial bouquet can be purchased. This is commonly done, especially because some brides want to save their real bouquet," Samuels mentions.
The bouquet can get stuck in a lighting fixture or a floral installation on the ceiling, or tip over a tall centerpiece or lit candles. However, Samuels says that these scenarios aren't that common. "More likely, awkward scenarios might ensue. As a destination wedding planner, I have witnessed the ultimate in competition, with fighting among guests who are eager to catch it and “win” the competition. This sometimes leads to embarrassment and even injuries.
Other awkward moments include when the bride misthrows the bouquet, landing nowhere near the group, or when no one steps forward to catch the bouquet. Ultimately, the tradition is designed to have fun instead of worrying about what could go wrong, so it’s best to have fun with it and laugh it off if something awkward were to happen."
It might be helpful to have a team member, such as the MC or wedding coordinator, to assist in the toss
To ensure that the bouquet toss goes smoothly, Samuels recommends choosing a lightweight and soft-edged bouquet and making sure the area is clear of obstacles that people can bump into or damage. "Let participants know where to stand so they can be prepared, and remind participants that it’s a fun and playful tradition to prevent overly competitive behavior," the planner adds.
Michaelas adds that it might be helpful to have a team member, such as the MC (master of ceremonies) or wedding coordinator, to assist in the toss. "They can clear out a designated space, give guests a heads-up, create the right atmosphere, and make sure everyone is in position for this fun moment."
She also adds that forcing guests to be a part of such a tradition isn't going to be a good look. "It might lead to disgruntled expressions, which won’t make for great photos and could leave a sour taste in guests' mouths. It’s always better to let guests decide if they want to join in, ensuring that everyone involved is happy to be there."
"The main thing to remember when hosting any guest at any celebration is to consider the overall tone of the celebration and the personalities of everyone involved before deciding to pull a joke. If you’re not sure how it will go over, my advice is “when in doubt, go without”. It would be a shame to ruin a relationship over something that you merely intended to be fun," Samuels concludes.
Readers unanimously agreed that he made a jerk move
