#1
I asked him what does he do to curb it, because it's really difficult to drive with those. He asked what I meant. I explained "well like when you drive over a bridge and get the intrusive thought of what would happen if you swerved and landed in the water? Could I actually survive? How heartbroken my parents would be and would my books go to the right friends afterwards? Before I know it I'm crying behind the wheel! That's dangerous!"
He prescribed me anxiety medication before I stopped talking.
Many people brush off their health symptoms as nothing too serious, when in fact they probably should be high-tailing it to their doctor, or even the hospital. According to experts, there are certain symptoms that you should never ignore but we'll get to that a little later. First, let's distinguish between signs and symptoms...
According to Brown University School of Public Health, a sign is something that can be seen by others. "For instance, a rash may be a sign of a skin condition, while an elevated blood sugar level may indicate diabetes," explains the site. "It can be observed or measured by others, including your family and doctor."
Symptoms cannot be seen or measured. They are only experienced by and apparent to the person who is experiencing them. "A ringing in the ear may be a symptom of tinnitus – but no one else can hear it," the site notes. "Symptoms indicate when something is wrong in your body. It could be an illness, injury, or medical condition."
#2
Yeah she said I have OCD. Apparently if you don't flick a light switch three times, the oceans won't dry up.
#3
She sent me to a gynecologist and last month I got my uterine ablation. It's been so much better living without every other week of excruciating pain and extreme bleeding.
Symptoms can be classified into three categories: remitting, relapsing and chronic.
Remitting symptoms are ones that improve or go away completely, relapsing symptoms those that were previously experienced and resolved, but return again, and chronic symptoms are long-lasting.
Certain symptoms list can indicate the possibility of a dangerous or life-threatening condition. And if you experience them, warns Brown University, you should seek immediate medical attention.
#4
Then one day at the end of a session after my mom had screamed at me for whatever reason on the car ride over, she decided to call me to scream at me some more over the phone.
Well, I put that on speaker and let my therapist hear the whole thing, and I could see the look of shock and realization in his face. He had a chat with my mom soon after and wouldn’t you know it, I never went to that therapist again.
#5
#6
She asked for examples and I told her about the time I asked for certain things not to happen during intercourse because I’d actively had pain and some physical issues after wards. It was ignored until I cried.
I made extra sure that none of that happened for the foreseeable future. Then after that I thought they understood to not do it… They did it again and I just disassociated through it. My therapist had to stop me and be walk me through how that is not a failure of me communicating and was in fact r**e.
Turns out I was communicating, to a r**ist.
The first symptom you never want to ignore is chest pain, or pressure and pain that radiates to your jaw or upper back. "These are classic heart attack symptoms and require immediate medical attention," warn the experts, adding that shortness of breath or difficulty breathing are also symptoms you should take seriously.
"If you feel like you can’t breathe, or can’t get enough air in your lungs, you should call 9-1-1," reads Brown's site. "Known as dyspnea, this could indicate several dangerous conditions, including asthma, heart issues, pneumonia, or a blood clot in the lungs."
#7
Or rather, I simply did not notice them beyond the baseline level of abdominal pain I was accustomed to.
They stuck the monitors on my belly and kept saying, "There's another one. And another. And that was a BIG ONE! Are you sure you don't feel anything???"
Turns out, when you live with chronic constipation for 30 or so years, you forget what it's like to have a relaxed, comfortable gut.
#8
I was explaining my family dynamics and how things worked at home. Very factual based, not emotional, just establishing the family dynamics. Its why it confused me when she started tearing up, had to work hard to contain herself to remain professional while expressing her desire that she really wished she could give me a hug.
Nothing I described was that bad, I had a big house, parents, little brother. There was no substance use. No alcoholism. No money issues. I wasn't really beaten or anything. No things severe enough to warrant such a response. It wasn't bad in comparison to the other horrors that happen behind closed doors.
It took years of therapy for me to grasp that she was responding to the severe emotional neglect that I endured growing up. I was so emotionally disconnected while she watched as I basically road mapped how my parents failed me in every other way that mattered. Utterly clueless at the significance of it all.
Her heart broke for me where mine should've. Tbh I still struggle to accept that it was emotional neglect, to call it emotional neglect, but I cannot deny the damage it had done to my mental health.
#9
While some people would be happy at the thought of unexplained weight loss, experts say it's not something you should take lightly.
"Losing weight without trying, especially a significant decrease in weight or over an extended time, can be the symptom of something more serious,' warns the Brown University team. "In general, doctors recommend that any loss of more than five percent of your body weight without trying is reason for concern."
#10
Apparently that’s not supposed to happen. Oops.
#11
Anyway, I no longer have a uterus.
#12
The surgeon I saw was horrified I'd been left like that for so long and agreed it was probably best to remove it. 6 months later he did the procedure and found that the polyp had been growing into my bile duct, partly blocking it. The walls of the actual gallbladder had become so thin as a result of constant inflammation they were one hard sneeze away from straight up splitting open, and it was full of sludge and small grit like stones. It had also become stuck on the outward facing side of my liver with scar tissue and had to be peeled off of it. He apologised to me afterwards because I should never have been allowed to get that bad. During the following up I explained that I have chronic pain and so basically just got used to it. I live with pain every single day, so over time the gallbladder pain just blurred in with the rest of it. I got on with life like that. Went to work, visited friends, took part in hobbies etc etc. The look on his face while he digested that was one of the few times I've seen genuine empathy from a medical professional when talking about chronic pain and what it's like living with it. I lived in spite of it because I had no other option. I went 7 years like that because for a good 2 years I stopped trying to get help for it because it became clear to me no one was interested and I wasn't going to waste my time just to get accused of d**g seeking. His apology was genuine and I hope it opened his eyes a little into the fact that just because a patient isn't screaming and crying, it doesn't mean they aren't in pain. Some of us just have a lifetime of practice at hiding it.
Unexplained weight loss can be caused by several underlying conditions, including diabetes, inflammatory bowel diseases, overactive thyroid, cancer, heart conditions and more. Experts advise that you see a doctor if you've been losing a lot of weight without trying.
The same goes for sudden swelling of your legs. While this can happen due to extended periods of sitting, standing, or even from being overweight, there are other more serious causes. If your legs are swollen, it's wise to have them checked by a medical professional because it could be a sign of heart disease, vein issues, or kidney problems.
#13
#14
#15
Headaches aren't uncommon but there are certain instances that they could point to something serious.
"Any sudden onset of an intense headache, 'the worst headache of your life,' or headaches accompanied by other neurological symptoms (weakness on one side, confusion, or seizures), are reasons to seek immediate medical attention," warn Brown's experts. "Severe, sudden headaches could indicate a stroke, aneurysm, or head injury."
#16
#17
#18
Me: Tells him everything going on….
Doctor: “Well s**t, how are you doing this unmedicated and you are always so happy”
Me: “because my kids need me, it’s either try to be happy or you admit me on s*****e watch”.
Feeling dizzy can also be caused by various things, some more serious than other.
Infection, vertigo, medication reactions, and dehydration are among the many culprits. But if you experience severe dizziness, or you feel dizzy while at the same time have a high fever, numbness, weakness, chest pain, vomiting, or a stiff neck, experts advise that you seek urgent medical attention.
#19
#20
She said that she was surprised because nothing else in my therapy really told her I was still struggling with fear. She was really worried about it. She started doing a different type of therapy with me based on that revelation.