Hey Pandas, What Are Some Funny Ways You Got Revenge? (Closed)

When i was in primary, the child who sat next to me in drawing class would always copy my art and claim it was her own and i copied off her.

So naturally, i started drawing the worst i could (while secretly working on my real project at home).

When the primary school art show came in the spring, my nemesis had a little portrait of her stick figure family in front of a home. Not bad.

I, on the other hand, have a large mural of me pointing at an anonymous child and calling them out with big letters “ 詐欺師” (means impostor or cheater or con man).

some of the best primary school art i ever did.

When i was little my big sister would steel all my things and brake them so one day I grabbed her phone and hot glued it to the carpet of her bed room . I wonder why she never told my mom 🤔

I was being bullied by this one kid named Marcus and his group of friends, and one day, I have had enough of him and his rudeness, so I decided that I was going to get my revenge, and I kicked him in the nuts, and he surprisingly stopped picking on me because of that, and I didn’t even regret it one bit, his friends called me their worst nightmare, and I proudly wear that like a badge.

As a child, my mother would constantly scream at me, punish me, scold me and call me names. I'd hear numerous times that I was "stupid, dirty, lazy, good of nothing, pathetic, shameless" etc. She'd punish me regularly for the smallest trifles. Nothing of what I was trying to do was good enough for her, and every day she'd find occasions to yell at me.

One day she was in the kitchen preparing pickles for the winter. She was working with big, glass jars that had veggies and condiments inside, and poured hot water over them to start the fermentation. Obviously, she started yelling at me as I entered the kitchen (I don't even remember the reason why). The moment she called me "shameless b***h", one of the jars she had just sealed literally exploded, throwing pickles all over the place: the walls, the floor, her clothes. I guess the glass was already cracked and it broke under the pressure of hot water. The kitchen was a mess with pickles shattered everywhere, and she was suddenly silenced. :)))

I could hardly hide my satisfaction. It was like somebody up there was on my side. I refused to help her clean: "I must go, see you!" (And no, I was never a "shameless b***h". I was one of the nicest kids you could ever imagine.)

I had to get up incredibly early in the morning with my dad and told my little brother to have our eight month old puppy sleep with him that night (she can't be trusted alone in the house quite yet). He went to bed and left her with me.
So she slept with me and at four in the morning I shoved her in his room.
I get an angry text in the morning saying that she peed everywhere and tore up his things.
I simply reminded him that I needed to leave early in the morning and that he should have taken care of her the previous evening like I asked him to.
Minor scolding from my dad but it was totally worth it.

Mortal enemy (a lot older than me, in same school, male) purposefully stole my phone and homework. Passed off homework as his own. Got phone password from unsuspecting mum (cue the ‘oh so you’re my daughter’s good friend! So, you need to use her phone to do something very important?’) and sent mean stuff to every single friend in contacts, including his fake confessing to my BFF’s boyfriend, which is so f*****g messed up. (I had some major explaining to do later.)
I eventually got phone back in a few hours (cue mum’s ‘what? You say you lost the phone. Uh…’) but he used up my allowance in it within the three hours it was stolen to buy himself fancy stuff. Also, he randomly deleted my photos, or saved pictures onto his own phone by taking a pic of my phone. (Luckily there wasn’t any SERIOUSLY private stuff in my photos.) He posted these ugly selfies I took of myself into our school web and kids were all laughing at me. He also gossiped with everyone about literally everything about me and said some really mean s**t about me being Chinese and should therefore remove my stupid existence from America.
But I didn’t care enough, because I have evidence of him cheating on computer exams, so I sent it to school student council (my older sister is in it too) and he was chewed out by the principal. Parents called and all. That wasn’t the end, because that happened a lot of years ago. I think the ultimate revenge is for him to completely stop his a*****e jerk moves, and this was achieved in the most unimaginable way possible: guess who’s my brother-in-law now?
Well, they decided not to have a big wedding because my nice sister didn’t want to waste any money. They held a tiny event at his place last week, and watching them to be completely in love was actually kind of satisfying. Let’s just hope this thing works out, because he’s kind of being more mature with getting his master’s degree.
But you still freaking owe me fifty dollars, Stephen.

guy friend: the north pole called, they need there elf back
me: the zoo wants their giraffe

My ex-manager made me (a part time sales person-- 2 levels below him) make his presentations and sales reports. To make them I needed to go through a tonne of info on every product sold in our location, find comps at other locations with similar markets and determine what products we needed vs what was available in our supply lines as well as figure out why certain things weren't working. I didn't go to school on this and he didn't explain how to do it just sent me a vague 1pg report summary from another location and left it for me to figure out. Each one needed spreadsheets (because natually most of the info couldn't be exported to spreadsheets), written explanations of changes in market and product availability to consider, and a cute presentation as well as a one page summary.-- short versions of basic sales was done bi-weekly which took about 2-3hrs, the full form one was monthly and took about 10 additional hours because our syatems were antiquated and I didn't have all the access points it took more time to compile all the info. At first I didn't mind but word got back from a fulltimer brought in on one such meeting that he was talking credit for them. I also was told I wouldn't get anything from this additional work that literally no one else had to do in my position (no wage increase or title change). Now-- for context I worked about 20hrs a week I didn't get more hours to do it, I also had no leniency to get it done-- even on vacations as I would come to find out.

I could have done the obvious which is to just not make them-- but I wanted to ensure he knew I was committed and competent but also that I wasn't going to let him f**k me.

On my next report (which I made on my off time just to ensure it was perfect)-- I carefully locked the documents.

I sent them (pre-teams and sharepoint) as attachments. He downloaded them, didn't check them because I sent them about 10min before the meeting. He got to the meeting in front of the store manager, regional manager and, on this special meeting the deputy country director who was located overseas (as well as many other managers no in his chain of command), attempted to open the file only for it to come up saying it was locked to its author and needed my credentials.

...it was quiet on the sales floor, so I timed my break accordingly. The breakroom shared a wall with the office having the meeting do I could listen. He tried it on no less than 3 computers before someone pointed out he can't open it because he's not the author... he then tried to skip the spreadsheets and go to the presentation which would play... except whoopsy me I put a watermark on it, only removable with password entry.

I got brought in for the meeting and he sheepishly had to admit that I was writing them-- I added that I also processed all analyses myself with limited resources. I still didn't get a raise or a title boost but I sat in on each meeting and I did make friends with high ups in the company and that country director even wrote me a letter of recommendation before they changed positions to a different country.

For anyone slightly curious-- I locked all documents I worked on from then on out, giving each one a unique alphaneumeric password. My gift to them :)

My brother and his friends were super loud and obnoxious outside one night when I was trying to sleep and I had to work early the next morning. It felt like I had just gotten to sleep when they all started stomping into the house (about 5 am). I knew it was useless trying to go back to sleep when I had to be up soon anyway. So as THEY all started to fall asleep in the living room I put The Lion King soundtrack into the CD player which was hooked into the surround speakers (this was early 2000s, ok), turned the volume ALL the way up and hit Play on “The Circle of Life”………………………..NAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH. Then just for kicks I ran the vacuum. Hahahahahaha.

Some kids at school were bullying me (no clue why, i'm no good at human emotions so it could be anything). This had been happening for a while and I had been ignoring it cos they were really bad at getting to me (eg. saying nobody likes me but I honestly don't care cos I don't like anyone). So one time this happened.
A is the main person bullying me
H is my best friend

I was late to lunch because I was in Cooking class and it went a bit over. When I got to my normal table, A and her group were already there. I said "please can you go to a different table, there is a bunch of empty ones everywhere else and this is my normal one and it's smaller than the others and you are a bigger group so could you please move" and one of them (i forgot who) said "nah" really rudely so H and I went and sat somewhere else where we could still kinda see the table from where we were. Then we saw them packing up to leave so we started packing up to move over and when they saw we were packing up they sat back down and we unpacked. then this happened again. Then one of them came over and said they were done, we could have the table now. So I packed up an went over but they were still sitting there so I sat where i normally would and did like normal and ignored them and there just happened to already be someone sitting there so I sat on her. Then they all got mad and stood up and scrabbled on my computer keys so I yelled at them and then they left and a teacher arrived. Later one of them came over again and apologized.

Totally worth it

A year or two ago, I was playing Rocket League (for those who don't know, it's basically soccer/football but with cars). I was playing with my teammate, and we were scoring some goals and doing well, but they were being really mean to the other team. I was telling them to calm down, and just play, but they start turning on me, and being a jerk to me too. At this point, I'd had enough; so I pushed them out of our goal to let the other team score. I then switched teams, and we (my new team) tied the game to go to overtime. The cherry on top was that I scored the winning goal.

My sister got me grounded for something, (I think she ate all of the chocolate and blamed it on me. Not sure) so I readjusted the shower head and put it on high power so that she got sprayed when she turned it on. Kinda lame compared to everyone else’s, but still funny.

I put turkey in someone who was mean to bsf so a random dog came up and licked them in front of everyone 😃
They hate dogs , and I also did it in front of their crush.
Keep in mind I was still in elementary at this time.