Hey Pandas, What Are Your Funny Sleeptalking Stories? (Closed)

As a child I made 6 jam sandwiches & put them under the bed (I HATE jam sandwiches.) Another time I woke mum cos I needed an apron. I’ve also turned on all the house lights.
As an adult I’ve punched my husband and stripped the bed looking for spiders.
Apparently I often mutter things. I pity anyone who shares my bedroom! 😂😂
Unfortunately my eldest daughter takes after me 😂

My little sister woke my mom up one time by screaming, “I hate Evansville!” When my mom asked why, she wailed, “There are monsters coming out of Build-a-Bear!!!”

Slightly different, but I used to get a bunch of glasses out of the cabinets and fill them up with water then set them on the floor in the kitchen

My ex-foster sister was once talking about wanting "Unicorn Juice". I told her we don't have unicorns, she told me to look out the window. I then asked her how one obtains unicorn juice- "By squeezing their horns!!"

I also don't sleeptalk but I was once lost in a book and my mom told me to let out the dog- I deadass said "What's a dog?"

One time, me and my family were all camping. We had a fairly large RV and we’re all sleeping in there together. All of a sudden, in the middle of the night, my brother yells to my sister, “I like pork!”

According to my college roommate, in the absolutely silence of our dorm room one night, I sat up and demanded, "Will you please stop that incessant noise!"

When we were kids my sister once woke me up by rummaging through the dresser drawer muttering something under her breath (we shared a room). I got up and told her to repeat what she said, I didn't hear her. She repeated herself in an entirely alien language and continued to rummage. As I got close to her I realised to my horror she was sleepwalking and sleeptalking. She never sleepwalked, before or after that incident, but she did occasionally sleeptalk. I slowly led her back to bed and she fell fast asleep. Oh, and about that time I got up and needed to pee so bad but both bathroom and toilet were occupied so I went to pee in the large garbage bin we had in our kitchen... I startled my mom who came to get some water (I suppose after using the bathroom) and she took me to bed. Haven't lived it down since

Once in my sleep, I said Dinosaurs, walking with dinosaurs! And a short while later I went to go see Walking With Dinosaurs and it was amazing! My mom thought it was funny that I was excited about walking with dinosaurs even when I was sleeping.

I don't sleep talk, but my Dad does. A couple weeks ago, he asked my sister, "Are those peppers ready yet?".
Sister has no idea what he's talking about so she says, "No?"
Then he tells her, with spite, "That's because you don't do anything right!"
He's not like that normaly, so it was frickin' hilarious.
Same sister laughs in her sleep sometimes, it's horrifying.

right before something big is happening in my life i usually start sleepwalking or talking because of stress. so not long before year 7 started (first year of high school) i crawled out of bed and onto the floor before proceeding to “dig” the carpet. my sister who shared a room with me only realised because i started yelling “the rice is in the drain, the rice is in the drain!” i to this day still have no idea what that was about

I was around 8 at the time and my mom said i was talking about dragons pooping coconuts and throwing up jellybeans

I stayed with a friend. the next morning she told me she woke up in the night and had to go to the bathroom. When she came back, I was sitting up in bed, yelling "I wish you a good night!" and threw me back onto my back.

Oh my god.
So I don't personally sleep walk or sleep take, but my middle sister (we'll call her L) does. And one of my absolute favorite stories is about the time my oldest sister (C) caught her and FREAKED the f*ck out.

So L is like... 6 or 7 years old at the time, and C is like 16. C had gone on a movie date, they'd gone to see some horror film.
C gets home and it's nearly pitch black inside. Everyone is in bed and the only sound is coming from the static noise on the TV in the living room. She's already on edge from the movie and decides the TV is just too much, so she moves towards the living room (front door was in kitchen) to turn it off and sees L sitting down cross legged in front of the snow static TV unmoving.
C asks her what she's doing and L turns back to look at her REAL slow and simply responds
"I'm talking to the TV people"
C LOSES. HER. SH*T.
She immediately bolts towards our moms room and slams the door open. Shes crying and insisting something is wrong with L. She's possessed or something and she doesn't know what to do.
My mother is of course worried so she rushes out to the living room to see L sitting there, still staring at the TV.
She's asks what L is doing.
"Shh. The tv people are trying to find the kitty."
"What?"
"I'll help."
L then stands up, eyes closed and begins walking right past them both and into the kitchen. It's at this point my mother understands what's happening and has to spend the next 10 minutes trying to reassure C her little sister is not in fact possessed and has started sleepwalking for the first time ever.
C wouldn't watch horror movies for months after this. And to this day, she can't watch the ring without getting all embarrassed and flustered when someone inevitably brings up the similarities.

oh gosh! I have a few. one of the first was me apparently sitting up in bed and screaming "HELP THE BIRDS ARE EATING PEBBLES! THE BIIIIIIIIIRDS". other times I've spoken with an accent (usually Irish or Scottish) in my sleep, which is pretty confusing.

I once said "Where are the games? What games are we going to play?".
My dad has said " We need to get the chickens", "Bebe" and " Why does it always happen to us?"
My friend has said "(name) wake up. We need to go downstairs and get the pies" + "Quick! Hide. He's here"

One time I screamed in my sleep for whatever reason, and scared my dad. Another time I started singing something like, "I'm going on an adventure" in my sleep while I was at a campout with others... I wasn't told of what I did until we left, but it makes sense now why everyone was laughing at me randomly in the morning.

One time, I went on a vacation with my parents and there was only one bed in the hotel room so I slept on a rolling bed next to the couch. My mom was taking a nap in the bedroom so my dad came and sat on the couch. He dozed off and I wasn’t really paying any attention to anything except my iPad game until he said my name. I said “yeah?” but he didn’t respond. I looked up and he was asleep. Weird, I thought, but I went back to my game. A few minutes later, out of nowhere, he said “let’s go see the Native Americans…” I was very confused so I tried to wake him up to ask what he meant. He didn’t open his eyes. I went back to my game. A few minutes later, he muttered “coffee ice cream…mmmmm….” I laughed out loud until I couldn’t breathe, but he still didn’t wake up. I went back to my game. He didn’t say anything else that time, and I never heard him sleep talk again.

i was at a sleepover and my best friend said i had said the word ‘lemon’ like 6 times.

At a sleepover, me and my friends were talking, one person fell asleep. Suddenly they sit up straight, say “mweehjigdeu” and lie back down to sleep. Then again they say up straight, said “I don’t feel so good, Mr. Stark” and go back to sleep.

While in a pain program I was staying with my dad's girlfriend. In my sleep I said. The unicorns. The unicorns. We gotta put them in the shoping cart.

When I was in seventh grade, I took my first midterm exam. It stressed me out so much(I'm the kind of person who considers school as a top priority) that I would finish all my homework in a rush and spend the rest of the day studying for the exam.

A couple of nights before the dreaded day, I was dreaming that I was jousting in a tournament (yes, I'm a medieval history geek). Suddenly, my opponent asked, "What is an atom?"

I immediately woke up, sat ramrod straight, and recited, "An atom is the building block of..."

I cut myself off as soon as I realized what I was doing. Thankfully, this was at 3 in the morning, so my sister was sound asleep(she would've laughed about this for eternity if she knew).