Hey Pandas, What Is An Embarrassing Story From Your Youth? (Closed)

I was very much a nerd/weirdo/outcast as a child. (haha like that was only in childhood; I still am!) My mom used to move me to a new school every year during elementary school because she'd decide (for whatever reason) she hated the current school/teachers/etc. So I was always the "new kid" and never had any friends. Plus, I was a girl that liked bugs, climbing trees, and playing in the mud and did NOT like dolls, jump rope, and other "girly" things. And I had Chia Pet hair. Anyway, I digress. One year, in third grade, it was the end of the year and we were doing yearbook signing. (I know yearbooks are usually a high school thing only in the US, but for some reason we had yearbooks at that elementary school, complete with little photos of us and all.) I had been wandering around the class trying to get the other kids to sign my yearbook, and no one had signed it except for the teacher. Then, lo and behold, I saw the Most Popular Kid In Class approaching me and MAKING EYE CONTACT, with his yearbook in his hands. He'd never said a word to me all school year, but here he was, walking TOWARDS me! When he got close, I was so excited that I grabbed his yearbook out of his hands, handed him MY yearbook, and signed his yearbook. When I finished, I looked up to see him just staring at me. He hadn't signed my yearbook yet. I think I said "Uh..." and he said "Sorry, I was going to ask you, have you seen Ryan?" (Ryan was another of the Popular Kids in class.) I mumbled "No", handed him back his yearbook, took mine back, and slunk away. The Most Popular Kid hadn't been approaching me to exchange yearbook signings, he'd only wanted to ask me if I'd seen his friend, the other Popular Kid. I believe I was 9 years old at the time, and I just turned 42. So I have obviously remembered this event with EXCRUCIATING clarity for 33 years XD I STILL feel embarrassed, haha. I know that Most Popular Kid probably never thought about it again, but boy oh boy, *I* think about it all the time, especially at 3am when I can't sleep XD

There's a lot: I peed on the porch, I threw a toilet at my brother, and I ate a squirrel.

I don't like reliving this in my head. During spirit week in Junior High we had this games, competition day. We got put in teams. There was a gauntlet race, going from one activity to the next. We had to do this one by one with 2 teams at once, so we had to keep up with each other. I can't remember all the activities. Near the end we had to get a basketball in the basket and meet up with your team to do a bench lift and walk, or "caterpillar". (a line of people straddling one of those long benches, lifting it up and walking a few steps then putting it down.) There were 2 teams doing this gauntlet at the same time. We had to wait for everyone on our team to get to the bench before we started the caterpillar walk.
Anyways, now that you get the gist. I just couldn't for the life of me get the basketball in the basket. I tried and tried. By the 6th attempt I was the only one still at the basketballs. People watching and my teammates were booing and laughing at me. A gym teacher came over and tried telling me how to aim the ball and how to throw it. The pressure was building up. My eyes were welling up. I wanted to crawl in a hole and die. I think the gym teacher was like, "Okay you tried enough times. Just go on." I'm surprised to this day I didn't just run out of there crying. Everyone on my team was pissed off at me. All I could think of was "I tried." and "Why did I suck so bad when I know I make some baskets in gym class?"

i made up a world called "magical unicorn land" when i was in like, 4th grade. i never believed in that sorta stuff when i was younger but everyone else did at that age. my motives behind it were kinda rude(it was so the younger kids, like straight up kindergarteners, would leave me and my friends alone when we played outside. yeah...i stopped doing that). i literally made up this cringy a*s poem i would chant so i could shift them to magical unicorn land and then straight up ignore them afterwards ;-;

i decided to tell my friends about this world, but i would always forget to tell the part that it wasnt real, and that it was so the little kids would leave me alone. one of them was in the friend group so she already knew. another was at school. both took the throne as "queen of magical unicorn land" and i was upset because i wanted to be the queen but i was too scared to stand up for myself. eventually i became more of a tour guide and wizard of the land.

so the two people figured out that they were basically fighting each other for the throne and i was a messenger between these people's fights. my god were they brutal. and i would be lying if i said that i didn't intercept the messages a little.

eventually it spiralled into multiple other people wanting to be crowned queen of magical unicorn land because i couldn't keep my mouth shut and i didn't know how to de-escalate a situation. in fact, i only fuel-ed the fire. and i was supposed to be the mediator of this madness.

i eventually crowned my favorite stuffed animal the true queen of magical unicorn land. i never told anyone, and eventually everyone forgot about it. i still have her majesty right now, and she has many loyal subjects :)

but damn the amount of drama that goes down in elementary school is WILD

I used to throw my pet guinea pigs (when I was around 7-ish). I thought that I was making it have better reflexes or something.

I once brushed my teeth with shaving cream instead of toothpaste. Later that day I was eating expired cookies and told my mom they tasted like shaving cream which made her confused as I refused to elaborate