Hey Pandas, What Is The Best Mental Health Advice You Ever Got? (Closed)

Toxic people don't learn until they realize that people don't want them around if they are like that. So, it doesn't matter if you stay in a toxic relationship or friendship, They won't change until they learn the hard way. You can't change people that don't want to change.

“Let anger flow over you like water over rocks” I honestly don’t remember where I heard that but it has helped me with dealing with retail customers

people care about you. even if you think no one does

It's okay to tell people no. I have a bad habit of bending over backward to help (especially if it is my family). I stress about not being helpful or not meeting their expectations. My best friend has gently said something about it periodically over the years and I've gradually learned to say no when I'm tired or have plans. I live a bit further away now so I'm not available for last-minute things which is nice but I feel like I'm not doing enough either.

My therapist told me if one of my customers is rude to me, I can walk away from helping them WITHOUT APOLOGIZING!

Just because you have a thought doesn't mean it's true. This is called cognitive fusion, when you can't separate thought and reality. It's an important characteristic of depression. I spent so long trying to fix my depression by trying to becoming skinnier, more likable, blah blah blah. Took me ages to realize the problem wasn't I'm stupid and ugly, the problem is I believed the depressed thoughts without question.

I recently learned these phrases:

We're all the same, made of the same parts, just organized differently.

The need to be "normal" is really the need to belong.

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I've struggled with internalized ableism for a long time, and even though I cognitively knew I'm okay as I am, I only recently managed to really feel that on a deeper level. These phrases really helped.