Hey Pandas, What's The Best Dad Joke You've Ever Heard? (Closed)

A priest, a usher, and a rabbit walk into a bar. The rabbit says "I think I'm a typo."

Listen.... dogs can't run an MRI machine, but catscan

Chicken and frog go to the library, chicken says, “book, book, book “ frog says “ read it, read it, read it “

What's brown and sticky?
A stick.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
He didn't have the guts.

today I learned that Dove chocolate tastes better than their soap. they must have had an off day

When I came out as gay I said “dad I’m gay” and he said “HI GAY I. DAD HAHAHAHA” kill me

What is a white drunken Chinese Rhinoceros? An albino wino Sino Rhino.

Did you hear the one about the dyslexic who ran into a bra?

I didn't know that football players were so intense for 25 cents. I wonder who stole it since the other players kept saying "GET THE QUARTERBACK!"

I saw a post where, apparently, a woman gave birth in her car on the way to the hospital. The husband suggested a name and they agreed on it.

The kid's name is Carson.

How do you get a one armed man out of a tree?
You wave at him

My son asked to me to explain what happens during an eclipse. I said, "no son".

What do you call a joke without a punchline?

Darth Vader had another daughter. What was her name?

Ella.

Ella Vader.

What do you call a fake noodle?
An Impasta

I was wondering why the ball got bigger and bigger the closer it got. And then it hit me.

A blind man walks into a bar... and a chair... and a door...

Then kid down the street used to build sand castles with his grandpa, but his grandmother took away the urn.

Y'all had some funny dads. The only jokes I remember r back from when we were poor n he would "joke" abt framing his suicide as an accident so that me, my brother, n disabled mother would get his inheiritance n then like we'd all just not rlly get it bc we were very young then