Hey Pandas, What's The Weirdest Advice You've Been Given? (Closed)

I was like 14, and this random old lady came up to me and started giving me heaps of life advice. She said to travel a lot before you got married, because once you're married you won't have freedom again. And don't waste your lives, dearies. Marry late. Travel now.

When she left, we all laughed.

Now in my late teens, and I think she had it right.
I'm planning to travel.

"Follow only the methods prescribed in boom to get correct answers always" —middle school Maths teacher

Now, after studying ancient Egyptian maths shortcuts, Vedic maths and some Chinese maths, I think I've got like a hundred reasons to prove that teacher wrong.

"Don't say hello to people. Your just giving the government permission to normalise working on sundays"

-Somebody I didn't even know, 2015

Just don’t be sad

"Don't be dumb anymore."

-My brother at 5

I heard this right before homecoming…

“Don’t do drugs, and don’t add or subtract from the population.”

It’s valid advice, but I never planned on doing this stuff anyway, and the way he said it just struck me as weird.

Never pee into the wind.

It's not often that I'm peeing in a windy field, but if I ever do, I'll keep this in mind.

If I wanna date someone then I should wait at least two years for them to make the first move and do absolutely nothing.

This is literally the opposite of what I do and it worked for the person giving advice so ouch

i was writing something on a whiteboard and my 6-year-old brother said “that’s not how we write” because i accidentally made a T look like a D. (not weirdest, but funniest)

"If you ignore bullies, they'll stop bullying you." It does absolutely nothing

'Believe nothing you hear, and only half of what you see.'

I get it but, I dont.

When faced with overwhelming temptation, imagine yourself dead in a coffin. It calms excited nerves and helps you gain control of yourself.

in Walmart some guy came up to me and said "Love your mother." I was like 9.

Told to me by other teen moms:
"You should have another baby so you're daughter has someone to play with."