Hey Pandas, Whats The Weirdest Thing Kids In Your Class Have Said

i have a whole google doc dedicated to the funniest things my orchestra class have said, these are my favorites:
Violinist: I've had so much bad luck today, i won't even be surprised if my head falls of
Orchestra Teacher: That's ok, we’ll glue it back on. I have super glue.

Practicing a piece before a show
Orchestra teacher: crescendo, Crescendo, CRescendo, CREscendo, CREScendo, CRESCendo,CRESCEndo,CRESCENdo, CRESCENDo, CRESCENDO! GOOD JOB MOTHER TRUCKERS!

Violinist: The cutest couple in this room is (Cellist 1s name) and his cello
Cellist 2: Why are we shipping instruments and human beings?
Cellist 3: Don't be instrument-phobic!

Cellist: Writing notes on music Separate. Separate. Separate. Just like my parents! *laughs at accidental joke*

Cellist: Cello shark is hungry. Cello shark want to eat your bow.
Violinist: How about *slowly puts on sunglasses* No.

Violinist: *wears halloween mask for most of class*

One day I was bored in chemistry class, so I started airdropping random pics from my camera roll. This is a common pastime for me. But on this particular day, there were a TON of people with their airdrop on. Usually there are only like 3-6 people, and even fewer who accept. But this class there were like 15 people and most of them accepted!
One of the things I sent was a drawing of buff Stitch my friend made, to give you an idea of what I was sending people. My iPhone is also named The Squirrel’s iPhone.
By the end of class, everything was chaos. This one kid at the back of the class literally yelled “WHO THE F*CK IS THE SQUIRREL?!??” As everyone was leaving class. My favorite thing said in class to this day.

My class has a really good vibe and we're all pretty comfortable with each other so we make each other crack up all the time. The most recent thing was when two of my classmates were trying to see how many times in a day they could press a button by hitting the +1 button at the speed of light. When each teacher came it, they had to explain themselves which led to some interesting conversations.

If you're wondering, it was about 47,000 times.

We planned world domination in science class. I brought the chemicals for the bombs, someone else brought the guns… etc.

Also, for all of you who know Kahoot, we all named ourselves a variation of “Lisa” (one of the students). Definitely Lisa, Aslo Lisa, Dictator Lisa, Lisa’s Matt (her boyfriend). Pretty fun class.

“My dad doesn’t work, he has to stay home and babysit the cat”.

We were about 18 and in biology class, watching a video of a woman giving birth (completely uncensored, if you know what I mean). After the video, the teacher asks if we have any questions. One girl raised her hand and asked: “Mrs. X, that hole where the baby came out, do they close it again?” “What do you mean”, asked our teacher, “like does the woman need stitches afterwards?” “No mrs. X, I mean there’s a hole, that needs to be closed again, right?

She genuinely didn’t know the vagina was a natural body cavity with its own entrance/exit. After a bunch of lessons about human reproduction. 🤦‍♀️