Oftentimes, breakups aren't easy. Even if it ends amicably and people remain friends after it, it still changes the couple's life as they knew it. It can mean a variety of things – from worldview to domestic changes.
As you can already guess, today's story is about a breakup that changed a couple's life. The biggest change for them was a move of homes, which turned out to be more dramatic and distressing than any of them could have expected.
More info: Reddit
After a breakup or divorce, a couple's life tends to change rather drastically, at least in some areas
Image credits: Brooke Cagle / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
For example, they might have to move places, which is something that happened to today's protagonist
Image credits: Blake Cheek/ Unsplash (not the actual photo)
After her husband decided he no longer wanted to be together, he asked her to move out
Image credits: stocky01 / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Since she couldn't afford to be a single mom in San Diego, she decided to move back to her hometown
Image credits: DigGrassanova
Her ex decided that her move was a way to punish him, to separate him from his kid, so he persuaded his friends and family to send the woman threatening messages
The OP had been with her soon-to-be ex-husband and baby's father for a decade, five of the years married. Until one day, seemingly out of the blue, the man told his pregnant wife that he was going to file for divorce.
He said that he realized that he didn’t want to be tied down as “he’s still young and needed to live his life.” So, he asked her to move out, and while she did that, he stayed with his friend. The problem was that the woman couldn’t afford to live in San Diego alone while maintaining her lifestyle, especially with a baby on the way.
That’s why she decided to go back to her hometown, where she has supportive parents, a nice rental home, and can keep her current job. This infuriated her ex. He started claiming that the only reason she moved was that she was trying to keep the baby away from him and get the upper hand on custody.
Still, no matter what her ex yaps, the woman doesn’t believe she’s wrong for moving away after their split. And she definitely doesn’t believe that she deserves the cruel messages the ex-husband, his family, and friends keep sending her.
Well, if you look at the woman’s situation closely, you can see that her decision makes sense. After all, living in San Diego isn’t cheap. For a single person, estimated monthly costs are $1,381.2, and that’s without the prices of rent. A one-bedroom apartment in San Diego costs around $2,975 monthly. So, basically, you need an annual income of $85,000 to $100,000 to live in San Diego comfortably while single.
Image credits: Gustavo Fring / Pexels (not the actual photo)
You see, there’s this thing that some dub as “singles tax.” Technically, it’s not actually a tax, but rather added expenses that can feel like one when a person lives by themselves. For example, a person doesn’t have anyone to split important everyday costs with, so the price that in other households falls on two shoulders falls on only one here.
This “singles tax” applies not only to essentials, but to costs of travel, social life, and entertainment. Like during travels, single folks might have to pay extra fees for utilizing an accommodation designed for two people. Or if they want to subscribe to a streaming service, they likely have to pay the price for themselves.
You get the gist – the world is designated for couples, and those who aren’t in a relationship have to literally pay a price for that. So, knowing the high prices of San Diego, it’s no surprise the woman had to move; if she wanted to live comfortably alone, this does not make her a jerk.
That’s what netizens thought too. In their eyes, it was clear that the whole guilt-tripping of her came from the man, who imagined the whole situation unraveling in a different way than it did, and is now lashing out.
What do you think – was the OP a jerk by moving? What would you have done in her shoes? Share all your thoughts in the comments!
She started questioning – what if she was wrong by moving away? But netizens reassured that she wasn't, as not being able to afford to live in a city is not a jerk-ish move
