Some couple know how to separate without conflict. They go through a divorce amicably and even remain on good terms after. For others (although they're in the minority, according to one study), divorce can turn into a full-blown circus.
Recently, a woman shared her friend's story about how her soon-to-be-ex-husband went "paranoid spy mode." He planted listening devices in her car, so, to get some sweet revenge for violating her privacy, the lady decided to let him know exactly how she feels. Knowing he's listening, she goes into tirades to seriously hurt his ego.
A husband bugged his wife's car during divorce, but she came up with a hilarious way to get back at him
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Every time she gets in the car, she has begun taking jabs at his ego out loud, knowing he is listening
Image credits: peoplecreations / freepik (not the actual photo)
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Listening in on someone without their consent is illegal in many countries
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While this story may be light-hearted and funny at first glance, it's more problematic the more you think about it. "Todd's" obsession with surveillance seems like a strategy to control "Lisa" and to know what she's doing at all times.
In reality, an ex or a spouse with a surveillance obsession can be a serious concern. According to private investigator Thomas Martin, bugging a spouse's car is a tactic often used by controlling partners. However unhealthy, this may be the spouse's attempt to address suspicions of infidelity. In fact, Martin claims that one out of 10 cars his agency sweeps for listening devices turns out to be bugged.
The author mentions that in "their country," surveillance cameras are legal if the spouse himself is living there. What's more, they mention that the laws in their country mean that both spouses will get 50/50 after the divorce. Judging from the information the author gave in the post and their previous activity on Reddit, the country they're talking about might be Israel.
Still, bugging a person's car with a listening device without their consent or knowledge is still illegal in Israel as well as in many other parts of the world: the U.S., the UK, the EU, Canada, Australia, etc.
Unlawful eavesdropping is illegal in Israel too (at least it was in 2019, according to a Haaretz reporter). Listening in to conversations without the consent at least of one party can result in five years in prison. The husband's behavior, therefore, is not only inappropriate, but might be illegal as well.
More and more people are becoming obsessed with surveillance of their loved ones
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Sharing locations, putting AirTags on children, downloading your spouse's text messages from the iCloud: these and similar modes of surveillance are becoming more and more normalized among people. While they might let us sleep better at night, they often also violate the privacy of our loved ones.
It's especially prevalent among intimate partners. A 2019 Norton survey revealed that almost half of Americans check in on their partners without their knowledge or consent. 29% said they check their partner's or ex's phone and 21% review their search histories. One in 10 of the respondents admitted to downloading surveillance apps to monitor their partners' data.
In 2020, researchers conducted a study where they analyzed the ways people track their loved ones. According to Rosanna Bellini, a researcher at Newcastle University’s Open Lab and the co-author of the study, it's quite chilling how some people justify their stalker tendencies. 44% said they don't trust their partner, and 38% claimed to be "just curious" to find out who their partner is talking to online.
The way some partners are so calculated and meticulous shocked the researchers. "The impacts of intimate partner surveillance are in line with the negative side effects of intimate partner violence," Bellini explained. According to her, we need to find out why people are so okay with breaching their partners' trust. "We need to get to the core underlying issue, which is why they have this desire to kind of control their partner's behavior," she said.
People loved the woman's way of dealing with a petty husband: "Love it"
Others had even more revenge ideas for the wife to carry out
Folks also started sharing their experiences with controlling and vindictive spouses
