Picture this, your parents give the news that they are pregnant and about to have a baby to your grandpa. And he’s so stoked to hear about this, he gives you a small fortune which might help you in the future. Sounds, sweet, right?
And now imagine this, your parents keep the money in a joint account to give to you in the future, but before you even turn one, your dad splurges it all. Does that anger you? It certainly angered the original poster (OP) whose father-in-law gifted $4k for their future baby but her husband ended up spending it all!
More info: Reddit
The poster of this story announced her pregnancy to her father-in-law, who was so delighted with the news that he gave her $4000 to help with medical bills and for the baby
Image credits: Lukas (not the actual photo)
The poster and her husband kept the money in their joint account and decided to give it to their daughter after she was born, and the poster also paid for all the medical bills by herself
Image credits: u/EmergencyGeneral4904
Image credits: senivpetro (not the actual photo)
After their daughter turned one, the poster asked her husband to give the money from their joint account so she could keep it in their kid's account
Image credits: u/EmergencyGeneral4904
Image credits: Drazen Zigic (not the actual photo)
But he said that she spent it on medical bills, and when she showed him she didn't, he said he used it for "hunting land" as their daughter wasn't entitled to it
Image credits: u/EmergencyGeneral4904
The poster snapped as she has been bearing all expenses for them, including mortgage, and also putting money in her daughter's account, so she asked him to figure out where the money went
In today’s story, Reddit user EmergencyGeneral4904 shared the story about her husband’s financial infidelity. It started when the couple were pregnant with their first child and they revealed the happy news to the family. Her father-in-law was so thrilled by this that he gifted them $4000 on Christmas for medical bills and the baby.
The couple kept the money in their joint account, which was in the husband’s bank, and the poster said that she didn’t really monitor the account. It probably sounds fair as she trusted him. When she delivered the baby, she took care of all the medical bills. She had also opened a separate account for her daughter in her bank.
After their kid turned a year old, she asked her husband to give her the gift money so she could put it in their daughter’s account. Well, he first said that she had spent it on the medical bills, and when she showed him that she hadn’t, he changed track, saying that it was all gone on hunting land, which she had not even approved.
He also called her “ridiculous” for bringing this up, and stated that their kid wasn’t entitled to that money. Well, that was probably the breaking point for her, as she states that she was already paying for almost all their expenses while also putting money in the daughter’s name so she can buy a car or go to college if she wants to in the future.
From her description, it seems that her husband has been just letting her bear the financial burden of the family despite being an heir to a multi-million dollar business. There even came a point where she was struggling to make ends meet, while her husband just leeched off of their kid’s money as well. She finally told him to explain where the money went and vented on Reddit.
People simply couldn't hold their rage back against the husband. And quite frankly, that's how we reacted, too. Quite a few Redditors said that he's just another rich narcissist who lives off of others' money to stay rich.
Image credits: benzoix (not the actual photo)
Research suggests that between 0.5% and 5% of people in the U.S. may have narcissistic personality disorder and between 50% and 75% of cases affect men and people assigned male at birth (AMAB). Looks like OP’s husband may be one among these.
Folks also said that he seems to feel entitled to her and even their daughter’s money, which is not at all acceptable. They expressed that she has been doing way too much in this relationship and no partner should feel entitled over the other. And this is not at all a marriage of equality.
As per Forbes, “Relationship entitlement refers to the belief or expectation that one deserves certain privileges or benefits from their partner. A dangerously high level of entitlement leads to the disregard for the other partner’s needs and wishes, making them feel unimportant and overlooked. Furthermore, relational entitlement can create a power imbalance, with one partner always getting their way and the other feeling helpless and unheard.”
Apart from acting entitled, he was also gaslighting her. Folks were furious that he had the audacity to say that she had used up the money when actually it was him who splurged it on unnecessary things. They expressed their worries that it might adversely affect her.
Verywell Mind States, “Gaslighting is a covert type of emotional cruelty in which the bully misleads the target, creating a false narrative and making them question their judgments and reality. Ultimately, the victim of gaslighting starts to feel unsure about their perceptions of the world and even wonder if they are losing their sanity.”
Well, now we know what they were worried about! They even advised OP to talk to her father-in-law and tell him how his son used the money. What do you make of that? We would love to hear your thoughts, so drop them in the comments below!
People said that the husband is an entitled narcissist who is financially mooching off of her, and she should tell her father-in-law about how he splurged their daughter's money
