Husband Gives Wife An Ultimatum: Either Quit Teaching Yoga Or The Marriage Is Over

It took Reddit user ElevenElevenPM a very long time to find what was missing from her life. However, now that she’s got it, her partner wants her to get rid of it.

In a brutally honest post on r/Relationship_Advice, the Redditor explained that yoga gave her a purpose that few things ever could. The hobby reignited her love for physical activity, provided a community, and quickly became a passion.

But amidst all the joy, the yogi's husband presented her with an ultimatum: either stop practicing yoga, or the marriage is over.

A lot of the time, people create an ultimatum because they feel like they've expressed their need in every way they could and it still wasn't met. In other words, ultimatums largely come from desperation.

"People often give ultimatums as a last resort when there is an identified 'deal breaker' in the relationship that they feel trapped by," said Josiah Teng, a New York City-based therapist.

The ultimatum is a way for them to exert control over something they feel they have no control over, such as their partner's behavior or their traits.

But, as with many last resorts, their success rate is very low. Marriage and family therapist Megan Harrison, LMFT, explained the dangers of ultimatums, saying, "They are particularly damaging because they are threats that force changes in behavior. [This] often leads to resentment and insecurity in the relationship since your partners felt pressured into doing something they didn’t want to do."

There's a good chance that the husband wouldn't be happy even if his wife decided to quit yoga. Harrison highlighted that "if you give your partner an ultimatum and they decide to abide by it, you'll always be wondering if they accepted your terms because they really love you and want things to work, or because they felt like they [were] forced to do so."

According to the therapist, "One of the best ways to work through your relationship problems without using an ultimatum is through clear and open communication." However, judging by this story, it sounds like the husband had retreated into his own thoughts and, for whatever reason, wasn't willing or hasn't been able to share them with his wife.