You’re pretty much expected to go the extra mile for family but, if you don’t set boundaries, you’ll be taken advantage of before too long. Of course, one particular family member has a bad rap for acting entitled. You guessed it: mothers-in-law.
One couple have found themselves in a bit of an awkward mess after they inherited a house from a late uncle, only to have it squatted in by the wife’s mother-in-law. Her obstinance is driving the couple up the wall, so they’ve turned to an online community for advice.
More info: Reddit
You’re basically expected to go the extra mile for family, but this woman’s mother-in-law is taking things way too far for her liking
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The woman and her husband have inherited a house from the husband’s late uncle, but the mother-in-law is refusing to move out of it
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To make matters worse, the mother-in-law is a hoarder, and keeps buying more stuff for the house while the couple are trying to prepare it for renovations
Image credits: teksomolika / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The stubborn woman refuses to give the couple a key for the house, but luckily the woman’s husband and his brother have a copy
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Now at her wits’ end, the woman feels like the only solution is evicting her mother-in-law, so she's turning to an online community for advice
When OP and her husband inherited a property from a late uncle, they thought it would be a chance to start fresh. However, there was one major complication: OP’s husband’s mother. After her own house fire, she had moved in with the uncle and, nearly a year after his passing, still refuses to leave.
The mother-in-law, a hoarder of note, has filled the inherited home with clutter, making it impossible to repair broken essentials like the water heater or well pump. Contractors can’t even give proper estimates without her hovering and shouting her opinions. Despite living there rent-free, she’s resisted every attempt to move things forward.
What makes the situation worse is that she almost withheld the house key and continues to sabotage progress. OP and her husband tried helping her clean, but she just replaces old junk with new stuff. Every 24-hour notice for contractors results in arguments, leaving OP and her husband stuck between wanting to renovate and watching the property fall apart under the mother-in-law’s control.
Now OP is torn. If the couple sends her packing, she’ll be living in her car until her burned house repairs are done. If they let her stay, the property could be condemned at the drop of a dime. Stranded between family loyalty and the reality of their inheritance, the couple are now left wondering if eviction is the only way to protect their future home.
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
From what OP tells us in her post, the couple are in a pretty precarious situation. The property clearly isn’t up to scratch, and her monster-in-law is only making it worse. What are the realities of having her evicted, though? We went looking for answers.
First off, OP mentions that her mother-in-law is a hoarder. According to the LifeCycle Transitions website, living with someone who hoards can be emotionally exhausting. Family members can experience frustration, guilt, resentment, and helplessness.
LegalClarity says a landlord can evict a tenant for hoarding, but the situation is legally complex. The eviction is not for the act of hoarding itself, but for the resulting violations of the lease agreement, health and safety codes, or both.
The Fair Housing Act (FHA) classifies hoarding disorder as a potential mental disability, though, which means tenants are protected from discrimination and are entitled to request a “reasonable accommodation”, such as a change in rules, policies, or practices, allowing a person with a disability an equal opportunity to enjoy their dwelling.
So, it seems the decision on whether to show her mother-in-law the door, or put up with her compulsive accumulation, is a tricky one for OP and her husband. Perhaps it’s time to get a lawyer, or even a therapist, involved.
What would you do if you found yourself in OP’s shoes? Do you think the couple should try and get the mother-in-law some professional help, or banish her to her car? Let us know in the comments!
In the comments, readers weighed in with advice, while the original poster did her best to answer the questions posed and shed more light on the situation
