Being a child star can be a life-altering, even traumatizing experience, as we came to realize after the tragedy of Judy Garland's story and the ones that followed since. Because of their fortune-making talents, children who get swallowed into showbiz at an early age regularly get taken advantage of either by their guardians or studio executives. And Jennette McCurdy, a 31-year-old former star of Nickelodeon's iCarly, is no exception to this.
On a recent episode of The Louis Theroux Podcast, McCurdy recalled the harrowing details of mandatory body examination by her stage mother Debbie, who would also bathe her until she was 17 or 18. "She would give me breast and vaginal exams in the shower and said that she was checking for lumps - she was just checking for cancer," she said, describing it as an invasive, humiliating experience.
While this might be shocking to most, McCurdy, who rose to fame in 2007 when she began playing Sam Puckett on Nickelodeon's hit iCarly - only to call it "hellish" years later - opened up about the exploitative nature of her childhood in a 2022 best-selling memoir "I’m Glad My Mom Died," laying bare the twisted secrets of her relationship with her domineering, deceased mother.
Among other harrowing stories from her childhood, McCurdy also wrote about needing a booster seat in the car at 14 after being forced to take up a strict diet which later led to struggles with bulimia. Also, her mom called her the s-word when she began dating and lied about who her biological father was.
"I consider myself fully recovered from eating disorders, and I’m really, really proud of that. And yet, I think that elements of my relationship with my mom will always be something that I’m exploring in some way," McCurdy told TIME last year.
In a recent podcast, Jennette McCurdy, a former Nickelodeon star, revealed that her domineering mother would bathe her until she was 17 or 18
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Jennette McCurdy found fame when she was only 15 years old after landing a leading role in the hit TV show "iCarly"
Image credits: Nickelodeon
Image credits: D. Sharon Pruitt
The former actress opened up about her abusive relationship with her mother in her recent best-selling memoir "I'm Glad My Mom Died"
Image credits: jennettemccurdy
Image credits: jennettemccurdy
McCurdy recently revealed that she felt 'humiliated' being body examined and showered by her mom but could do nothing about it
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Image credits: jennettemccurdy
In 2017, four years after her mother passed away, McCurdy announced she was quitting acting for the sake of her mental health
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Image credits: jennettemccurdy
Currently, McCurdy is doing a book tour and enjoying the success of her memoir
Image credits: jennettemccurdy
Image credits: jennettemccurdy
Image credits: jennettemccurdy
Image credits: jennettemccurdy
"I consider myself fully recovered from eating disorders and I’m really, really proud of that," she said in an interview last year
Image credits: jennettemccurdy
Image credits: jennettemccurdy
According to experts, there's a repeating pattern when it comes to controlling parents
If you've been paying attention to the showbiz world over the last decade, hearing the tragic story that befell Jennette McCurdy might not be all that surprising. Starting from Home Alone's boy wonder Macaulay Culkin, whose father pretty much controlled every aspect of his exhausting childhood, going to Michael Jackson himself, whose physically and emotionally abusive relationship with his dad was later reflected in one of the most disturbing moments in the cult TV show 'Atlanta' - it seems there's a price to be paid for young stardom. A price that even limitless fortunes can't cover.
"Controlling parents with fearful tendencies believe they are protecting you and take pride in their role as your guardian. What they might actually be doing, however, is smothering you and roping you into a symbiotic relationship," Imi Lo, a psychotherapist and the author of 'The Gift of Intensity', told Bored Panda in an email.
Echoing McCurdy's description of her mother, controlling parents don't trust the outside world and often are afraid of changes, Lo says. "Even minor mishaps and injuries can overwhelm them and when that occurs, they can break into a hysterical state, such as screaming and crying in an animalistic and uncontrollable way."
Growing up with parents like the ones we often hear about in the tragic stories of former child celebrities can mess up even the strongest of us. And even if you do manage to escape the controlling grip of such parents, this can lead to 'repetition compulsion'. According to Lo, "When we experience a traumatic event, our natural reaction is to try to make sense of it," even if that means gravitating towards familiar yet destructive patterns.
"One reason behind repetition compulsion is that we hope for a different outcome this time. Perhaps our parents never gave us what we emotionally need, so we still look outside ourselves for partners, employers, and teachers who will give us the attention, care, and approval we need," she explained. "By repeating the same behaviors and maintaining a harmful relationship, we hope to gain some control over it. We unconsciously try to make things right, even though we consciously know it is impossible."
This is what people had to say about McCurdy's revelation
